Looks Quotes by Dave Barry

The method preferred by most balding men for making themselves look silly is called the comb over.

— Dave Barry

I like golf because you can be really terrible at it, and still not look much dorkier than anybody else.

— Dave Barry

I watched as an extremely nerdy exhibitor - I'm talking about a guy who makes Bill Gates look like Brad Pitt.

— Dave Barry

If you look at photos of the Gettysburg Address there's a guy off to the right who I think is Keith Richards.

— Dave Barry

Orangutan are very weird animals but they look very soulful.

— Dave Barry

For 41 years I have gone with a very natural hair "look" that was originally popularized by coconuts.

— Dave Barry

Sir,” James asked, “what are we going to do?” “We’re going to look for water,” said Alf. “And food?” said Tubby Ted.…

— Dave Barry

You can say any fool thing to a dog and the dog will just give you this look that says, 'My GOSH,…

— Dave Barry

Technology is constantly improving our lives. Look at the cellular telephone. Just ten years ago, virtually nobody was able to get into…

— Dave Barry

And what is the Scientific Community doing about these problems, young people? THEY'RE CLONING SHEEP. Great! Just what we need! Sheep that…

— Dave Barry

In Spain, attempting to obtain a chicken salad sandwich, you wind up with a dish whose name, when you look it up…

— Dave Barry

I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software incompatibility problems that, in terms of complexity,…

— Dave Barry

We're deep into the holiday gift-giving season, as you can tell from the fact that everywhere you look, you see jolly old…

— Dave Barry

When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command.…

— Dave Barry

Sometimes you panic and find yourself emitting remarks so profoundly inane that you would be embarrassed to say them to your dog.…

— Dave Barry

If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice…

— Dave Barry

In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it "Christmas" and went to church; the Jews…

— Dave Barry

We're trying to make our current house look domestic so that somebody will want to buy it. We're making a lot of…

— Dave Barry

Think, for a moment, of the countless happy childhood hours you spent with this amazing device: Drawing perfect horizontals, drawing perfect verticals,…

— Dave Barry

The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed by IRS employees, whose…

— Dave Barry

Puns are little "plays on words" that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look at you…

— Dave Barry

Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring giant billowing clouds of smoke, hot rocks…

— Dave Barry

But that's kind of an easy stance to be if you're a humor columnist, because you're tending to make fun of the…

— Dave Barry

Look, in particular, at the people who, like you, are making average incomes for doing average jobs- bank vice presidents, insurance salesmen,…

— Dave Barry

A full-grown manatee, which can weigh more than 1,000 pounds, looks like the result of a genetic experiment involving a walrus and…

— Dave Barry

The best way to understand this whole issue is to look at what the government does: it takes money from some people,…

— Dave Barry

To enter Europe, you must have a valid passport with a photograph of yourself in which you look like you are being…

— Dave Barry

Men have no cause to criticize women about the way they are about weddings. Because men are like that about sports, but…

— Dave Barry

A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves…

— Dave Barry

Common criticism of the Internet is that it is dominated by the crude, the uninformed, the immature, the smug, the untalented, the…

— Dave Barry

So when I open the door on Halloween, I am confronted by three or four imaginary heroes, such as G.I. Joe, Conan…

— Dave Barry

We are talking about mutated women, the result of cruel genetic experiments performed by fashion designers so lacking in any sense of…

— Dave Barry