Don't spend too much time on the bed, only prostitutes can make money there..So wake up! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I start remembering all the times you told me you loved me and all the moments you took my breath away. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My mood is always good. Except for the time I have to get out of bed. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Every time I see 007 get a gadget in an old James Bond movie I'm like, My smart phone has that app. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I used to be a watchmaker. It was a great job and I made my own hours. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when somebody has to explain the tweet they just posted. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Everything is valuable only at two times; before getting it, and after losing it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Ladies, don't complain about why he came home so late. Take him in the room & remind him why he should get… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If I had a time machine, I would just go back to the last time I ate pizza. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I started pooping 10 times a day because it's where I come up with my best tweets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Things shall fall into its perfect place, in the perfect time, at a perfect setting that you will always be able to… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A vagina is a lot like a boxing match. When it all gets too bloody and messy, it's time to throw in… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Women love sex in the dark because they can't stand to see a man have a good time. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
In time your heart will heal. Have a little faith in your decision, I know it wasn't an easy one for you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My wife got naked & asked me to show her a good time. So I showed her photos of me & my… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If a guy tells you he's not ready for a relationship, it's ok to give him time. Just not any of yours...he's… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I blow my nose 10 time a day, if my nose were my penis I'd be in heaven. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A Woman Never Say: Let's just leave the toilet seat up at all times, then you don't have to mess with it… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The best thing about this tweet is, by the time you found it's completely worthless, it's too late for you to stop… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Love Love is a fruit in season at all times, and within reach of every hand. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Every time I see a dude wearing jeans with rips at the knee, I assume the rips came from sucking a lot… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't wanna discuss about it - People who want to discuss about it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
