Pieces Quotes by George Carlin

8 Pieces quotes by George Carlin

George Carlin’s eight reflections on pieces deliver his trademark wit and keen social commentary in a compact, punchy format.

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I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.

George Carlin

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If there were only one cherry pie in the world, and Bill Clinton owned it, I might get a piece of it.…

George Carlin

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A flag is supposed to represent everything that a country does. It doesn't only represent the good things. If you burn the…

George Carlin

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Grass probably helped me as much as it hurt me. Especially as a performer. When you're high, it's easy to kid yourself…

George Carlin

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I think tobacco and alcohol warnings are too general. They should be more to the point: 'People who smoke will eventually cough…

George Carlin

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If a piece requires some specific inflection, I'll record it. I take a lot of notes, and later categorize them, combining them…

George Carlin

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When you're high, it's easy to kid yourself about how clever certain mediocre pieces of material are.

George Carlin

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Writing books isn't a drastic departure from writing for the stage. I've always written in the long format, five, eight, 10-minute pieces…

George Carlin

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More by George Carlin

I never go anywhere or do anything that transports me outside the boundaries of my mind.

George Carlin

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With the proper training, I could've been an evil genius.

George Carlin

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Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken…

George Carlin

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“I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. ... These two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both…

George Carlin

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“TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY. Not true. Today is another day. We have no idea what tomorrow is going to be. It might turn out…

George Carlin

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I was a loner as a child. I had an imaginary friend - I didn't bother with him.

George Carlin

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Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.

George Carlin

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“If you guys want to get a MOM tattoo and save a little money, just get two letters done. Get about a one-inch capital…

George Carlin

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You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

George Carlin

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It ended suddenly for Brenda, more slowly for me. My runs began getting shorter and less pleasurable. I'd feel bad after only one day,…

George Carlin

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Is there another word for synonym?

George Carlin

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The whole idea of the pursuit of goods and possessions has completely corrupted the human experience, along with religion, which I think limits the…

George Carlin

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These days many politicians are demanding change. Just like homeless people.

George Carlin

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You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.

George Carlin

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What was the best thing before sliced bread?

George Carlin

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