Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now it's trying to save its body. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
That's the whole meaning of life, isn't it? Trying to find a place for your stuff. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I think you can talk about anything if the context is correctly arranged. If you set up the context and you bring… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
For a long time, I've distinguished between entertainer and performer and entertainer and artist. To me, an entertainer is someone who pleases… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
... the important thing is to, first of all, question everything you read or hear or see or are told. Question it,… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I was trying to get out of the night clubs and was thinking maybe I'll go to the colleges now; that's where… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I was a class clown, of the classic term for it. I would get the work done easily, and then I would… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I have a suggestion that I think would help fight serious crime. Signs. There are lots of signs for minor infractions: No… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
We spend the early years feeding our brains with information and the latter half trying not to think about it all. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Some people try to get out of jury duty by lying. You don't have to lie. Tell the judge the truth. Tell… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I just try to find targets I feel something about and express it my way. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School and my mother would get drunk and… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I use the [vulgar] words because apparently these words do not corrupt morally. I'm from the street in New York, hung around… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
It's not in the mainstream media yet, but the biggest jump in skin cancer has occurred since the advent of sunscreens. That… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I try not to see new comics - their acts or their films. Part of that is professional. I don't want to… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Interesting form of murder we come up with: Assassination. We assassinate people who've told us to live together in harmony and try… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Regarding local residents attempting to ban sex shops from their neighborhoods: You show me a parent who says he's worried about his… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
No matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, you're screwed because it's all fixed and rigged. There is a… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
An entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself. An artist is on a journey: they don't… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Did you ever stop to thnk about all the people we kill? They're always people who tell us to live together in… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I never go anywhere or do anything that transports me outside the boundaries of my mind. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. ... These two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY. Not true. Today is another day. We have no idea what tomorrow is going to be. It might turn out… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I was a loner as a child. I had an imaginary friend - I didn't bother with him. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“If you guys want to get a MOM tattoo and save a little money, just get two letters done. Get about a one-inch capital… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday! — George Carlin Copy Share Image
It ended suddenly for Brenda, more slowly for me. My runs began getting shorter and less pleasurable. I'd feel bad after only one day,… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
The whole idea of the pursuit of goods and possessions has completely corrupted the human experience, along with religion, which I think limits the… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
![“I use the [vulgar] words because apparently these words do not corrupt morally. I'm from the street in New York, hung around in a tough neighborhood. It was common to curse, you make your point. It's a very effective language. I try not to overdo it. It's never to shock. I know where it fits, it's…” quote by George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/17c/george-carlin-155_common_i-use-the-vulgar-words-because-apparentl_2276939.jpg)
