Congratulations, you have a sense of humor. And to those who didn't: Go stick your head in the mud. — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
“Every fat person says it's not their fault, that they have gland trouble. You know which gland? The saliva gland. They can't… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
I will not be a Democrat or a Republican. They are the problem, not the solution. We need to abolish political parties in this… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
I live in Mexico in the wintertime, and I live off the grid down there. — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
I've jumped out of an airplane 34 times. I've dove 212 feet under water. I've done a lot of things that defied death. — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
If you work for the federal government, the average salary is $7,000 higher than the private sector. Something's wrong with that, when you're making… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
You can grow marijuana, so the government can't tax you and they don't like that, that's why they prohibit it. — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
Prostitution is criminal, and bad things happen because it's run illegally by dirt-bags who are criminals. If it's legal, then the girls could have… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
I don't think I would want the responsibility for enforcing the death penalties. There's always the inevitable question of whether someone you gave the… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
For every day the government is shut down, it should be that we don't have to pay income tax that day because they're not… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
I believe in the separation of church and state. We all have our own religious beliefs. There are people out there who are atheists,… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
Okay, fluoride in the water to help our teeth. Well, shouldn't that be the job of your mom and dad? To teach you how… — Jesse Ventura Copy Share Image
