“It felt like my teeth were sweating. Eoin Colfer's The Legend of Spud Murphy” — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Everyone says that I have no sense of humor, then I construct a perfectly sound pun around a well-known psychological condition, and… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“Now, Benny was no eejit. He wasn't expecting the Tunisian nationals to be Irish. What he did expect was darkish people with… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“There were only two men on the planet better educated in the various martial arts than Butler, and he was related to… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“Toadstool mandarins are a form of toxic jellyfish whose tentacles are loaded with entheogenic venom. The effects of a mandarin sting are… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“Card five hundred and thirty-four," repeated Artemis. "Of a series of six hundred standard inkblot cards. I memorized them during our sessions.… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“All we can hope for is that he will fall into the ocean with a bar of soap in his pocket.” — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“I don't know why it is, Captain Short, but whenever you start agreeing with me, I get decidedly nervous.” — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“You don't understand!' Foaly objected. Trouble cut him off with a chop of his hand through the air. 'I never understand. That's… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“[Artemis] returned to the aft bay for Mulch's version of a briefing. The dwarf had drawn a crude diagram on a backlit… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
And I will not be beaten by that jackass." "Jackass?" said Foaly, wounded. "My favorite uncle is a jackass. — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Thankfully the rest of the world assumed that the Irish were crazy, a theory that the Irish themselves did nothing to debunk. They had… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
The craft's occupants clutched their armrests, and more than one of them closed their eyes. But not Artemis. He couldn't. There was something morbidly… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Tea? At the beach? No time for luxuries, Holly. There is important work to be done.” He winked at Butler. “Are you sure you’re… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Wait," said Butler. "Just wait, Holly. Artemis has a plan." He squinted through the green dome. "What is your plan, Artemis?" All Artemis could… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Holly is alive,' thought Foaly 'My princess lives,'exulted Orion. 'And we're chasing a dragon — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“There were only two men on the planet better educated in the various martial arts than Butler, and he was related to one of… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
If Elmore Leonard met Jim Thompson down a dark alley at midnight they might emerge a week later with thick beards, bloodshot eyes and… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Sig Sauer. Nine millimetres. Thirteen in the magazine. Big bullets. One of these hits you and it could blow your head off; something even… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
“I feel him near in the twist of me guts. It's something I've always been able to do. --The Reluctant Assassin” — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Onscreen, Foaly rubbed his eyelids with his index fingers. "Yeah, yeah. Here we go. Captain Short goes rogue once more. Hands up who's surprised.… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
![“[Artemis] returned to the aft bay for Mulch's version of a briefing. The dwarf had drawn a crude diagram on a backlit wall panel. In fairness, there were more artistic chimpanzees. And less pungent ones. Mulch was using a carrot as a pointer, or more accurately, several carrots. Dwarfs liked…” quote by Eoin Colfer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/ed3/eoin-colfer-736_carrot-top_artemis-returned-to-the-aft-bay-for-mulc_3057748.jpg)
