“All White House hopefuls we forewarn: You'll have to prove that you were born. Before Trump hits the state of granite, He… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
There's always a source for humor [in politics]. If it's inappropriate to write about, if there's nothing funny about it, then it's… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
If it's inappropriate to write about, if there's nothing funny about it, then it's not funny. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers? — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
“Paull has his own style, which is folksy, not canned. Religion? He's got one. His prophet's Ayn Rand. By Rand's eerie theories… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
With humor, it’s so subjective that trying to think of what the ideal reader would think would drive you crazy. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
“If Lincoln freed the slaves and preserved the Union, how come 'Lincolnesque' just means tall?” — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
“Daddy, how come in Kansas City the bagels taste like just round bread?” — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
“I am firmly committed to the proposition that whoever is in power is exceedingly silly.... And that goes for the opposition as well.” — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
People, not just reporters, are more interested in politics than in government, so the actual issues wouldn't be something that interested them. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
Perhaps we've time to have a look at the Number Thirty-One bus queue before we turn in. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
“All White House hopefuls we forewarn: You'll have to prove that you were born. Before Trump hits the state of granite, He must identify… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
We all know funny people who can't get it down on the page - even funny writers who can't get it down on the… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
If bumblebee leavings and stump paste are so good for you, why can't any of those guys (in the health stores) grow full beards? — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
At American weddings, the quality of the food is in inverse proportion to the social position of the bride and groom. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
As far as I'm concerned, 'whom' is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
Avoid restaurants with names that are improbable descriptions, such as the Purple Goose, the Blue Kangaroo or the Quilted Orangutan. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
I don't cook. I don't know anything about food. I've never reviewed a restaurant. — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
Fairs are good places to eat, particularly for stand-up eaters--which is one of the kinds of eaters I am, although when I eat standing… — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
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