While looking for love I sent my pictures to the Lonely Hearts Club. The reply came back, We are not that lonely. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
If you stare at someones tits long enough, you'll hear her saying Hey. Look up My face is above — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
HUSBAND, GOOD, A man who feels in his pockets every time he passes a mailbox — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Maybe there won't be stars, maybe there won't be retweets, but by God there'll be slying! — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
If your house is haunted think about how much time the ghosts have spent watching you masturbate. — Nikhil Saluja Ghosts Copy Share Image
Everytime I find a dead body, I wish it was a pizza. Every time. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
DEFENCE: What you'd better have around de yard if you're going to let de children play outside. — Nikhil Saluja Alcohol Copy Share Image
The problem with being just friends is I have to watch you be with someone who doesn't deserve you when I could… — Nikhil Saluja Friends Copy Share Image
I don't need beer to have a good time, I just need it to focus, avoid depression, good tweets, fall asleep, and… — Nikhil Saluja Beer Copy Share Image
Good girls think the office is the wrong place to have a romance Bad girls think no place is the wrong place… — Nikhil Saluja Bad girl Copy Share Image
Two things in life that are difficult to achieve: 1. To plant your idea in someone's head. 2. To plant someone's money… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE CEREMONY, a ritual which should be written (o cut down on divorces) -- by adding a line to the groom's questions… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Oh, everything's too damned expensive these days. Like this Bible. It cost 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everybody's a… — Nikhil Saluja Bible Copy Share Image
When I was a kid, everyone would call me pizza face. Not because of acne, but because I would always have pizza… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Good girls go to the party, go home, then go to bed. Bad girls go to the party, go to bed and… — Nikhil Saluja Bad girl Copy Share Image
