Children Quotes by Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, The last and most serious of the childhood diseases;

— Nikhil Saluja

Father: The banker nature gave children.

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, The child of illusion and the parent of disillusion;

— Nikhil Saluja

DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

— Nikhil Saluja

Kids are so cute when they're someone else's problem.

— Nikhil Saluja

FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him.

— Nikhil Saluja

SHOW OFF: A child who is more talented than yours.

— Nikhil Saluja

WEAKER SEX: The kind you have after the kids have worn you out.

— Nikhil Saluja

INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

— Nikhil Saluja

I got a teenage daughter and a menopausal wife. One's getting breasts, one's getting whiskers. My life is over.

— Nikhil Saluja

If you don't give kids the middle finger when their parents are not looking, we can't be friends.

— Nikhil Saluja

On his daughter's diaper: There was so much poop. It didn't look like a baby's poop. It looked like a 55-year-old alcoholic…

— Nikhil Saluja

Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge…

— Nikhil Saluja

STOREROOM: The distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.

— Nikhil Saluja

GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.

— Nikhil Saluja

School: An institute where the child goes to play while the parent goes to pay.

— Nikhil Saluja

Totally cool if anyone wants to unfriend me on facebook- posted 4 times today, but if you unfollow me on twitter I…

— Nikhil Saluja

A Deaf child says: For all of you, I am deaf; But for me, all of you are dumb¦ Moral: Life differs…

— Nikhil Saluja

If you recall childhood, you may remember that the kids who stuck straws and cigarettes up their noses back then seemed funnier…

— Nikhil Saluja

You know why the US can't find Osama Bin Laden? They're using the wrong agency to look for him. Don't send the…

— Nikhil Saluja

Children : The child is God's gift to the family. Each child is created in the special image and likeness of God…

— Nikhil Saluja

I'm a father figure, just not to my kids.

— Nikhil Saluja

My inner child is up for adoption.

— Nikhil Saluja

Teach your children about Tax . Eat 30% of their Icecream.

— Nikhil Saluja

The best thing about kids is making them.

— Nikhil Saluja

We approve of premarital sex until we have a daughter.

— Nikhil Saluja

If you have a son, you only have to worry about one penis. If you have a daughter, you have to worry…

— Nikhil Saluja

That awkward moment when you watch an animated movie from your childhood, and finally understand all the dirty jokes.

— Nikhil Saluja

Ladies: when your parents told you as a child don't spit honey, it's not lady like. Those same rules apply to blowjobs…

— Nikhil Saluja

Being a Mother means that your heart is no longer yours; it wanders wherever your children go.

— Nikhil Saluja

Apparently you aren't allowed to have problems if you aren't a starving african child or a delhi rape victim.

— Nikhil Saluja

Just read on the back of my baby's shampoo that it says to Keep away from children and now I'm so fucking…

— Nikhil Saluja

Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.

— Nikhil Saluja

FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster

— Nikhil Saluja

Abortion It is poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish.

— Nikhil Saluja

If Men Got Pregnant: Children would be kept in hospital until toilet trained

— Nikhil Saluja

TOP BUNK: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

— Nikhil Saluja

TEMPER TANTRUMS: What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.

— Nikhil Saluja

I named my first born child after my mother-in-law. In fact, lazy fat ass bitch turns 5 tomorrow.

— Nikhil Saluja

They say childbirth is the most pain women ever experience. Mothers prepare their daughters for this pain by brushing their hair.

— Nikhil Saluja