“The vampire who lived here was either a total loser or really liked the monster image. Really, if he couldn't be a… — Caroline Hanson Copy Share Image
“Nature has no originality--I mean, no large ability in the matter of inventing new things, new ideas, new stage effects. She has… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Good luck,” I said automatically and then wanted to kick myself. Good luck? Have a lovely time, Mal. Hope you find a… — Leigh Bardugo Copy Share Image
I was seeing this girl and she wanted to get more serious. But I wasn't ready to, I had just gotten out… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
“So what is it really like? What happens when people die?" Noor asks Alice Bhatti, who after finishing her shift has changed… — Mohammed Hanif Copy Share Image
On MySpace ... the whole demographic of the stand-up comedy fan has changed. It's like an indie band thing. People think they've… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Once I was in college, I was actually trying to write a comedy screenplay and I wrote basically the worst movie ever… — Scot Armstrong Copy Share Image
“The boy she'd once loved was gone, and she'd accept it. But even if she didn't want Eric back, he'd hurt her.… — Melissa Landers Copy Share Image
“When I was a wee little kid," remarked Roic, watching over their shoulders, "there was a time I thought that any skinny… — Lois McMaster Bujold Copy Share Image
“Extremely self-conscious in its craft, in many ways The Hand of Ethelberta is an exploration of fiction as illusion, which involves parody… — Geoffrey Harvey Copy Share Image
I like jokes and one-liners. I enjoy entertaining and making people laugh, being the funny man. But when I'm launched into unfamiliar… — Keith Flint Copy Share Image
“Ah college years, those were the days. Pure freedom ... leaving home for the first time…the parties…” "What about the tutorials, the… — E.A. Bucchianeri Copy Share Image
I'm trying to be the Jay-Z of comedy one day. I don't know if there's any comedy moguls out there, but I… — J. B. Smoove Copy Share Image
I believe that people, more often than not, act with the best possible intentions. And when they don't, that's funny to me.… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
For me and most of my friends who are comedians, if you've been doing comedy for a while, your tolerance for things… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
I've experienced plenty of times when something I think is funny doesn't do very well. And there are times when something I… — Carrot Top Copy Share Image
“They don't make morgues with windows. In fact, if the geography allows for it, they hardly ever make morgues above the ground.… — Jim Butcher Copy Share Image
“I have a little boy, younger than you, who knows six Psalms by heart: and when you ask him which he would… — Charlotte Bronte Copy Share Image
“Chana knows, I wondered sometimes how I raised that child without strangling her. By age six, [Jasnah] was pointing out my logical… — Brandon Sanderson Copy Share Image
Confidence is at the root of so many attractive qualities, a sense of humor, a sense of style, a willingness to be… — Wentworth Miller Copy Share Image
“GET IN" he says, getting in on the driver side. I get in with no questions. Okay. This is a bad movie… — Sara Daniell Copy Share Image
It's been part of my signature to incorporate my humor with my dance, or even just how I'm feeling. If I'm feeling… — Stephen Boss Copy Share Image
It did not look like the work of God, but it might have represented the handicraft of a God with a joyous… — Pat Conroy Copy Share Image
I had a three year relationship end. Ever have somebody just freak out on you in a relationship? Things are going great.… — Jim Norton Copy Share Image
I am actually talking about possibly adapting 'The Boys,' by Garth Ennis, which would not be a comedy, but an action movie… — Adam McKay Copy Share Image
“How funny.” I say flatly. “and I was hoping for a battle of wits but you appear to be unarmed.” His laugh… — K. Larsen Copy Share Image
But the true threats to stability and peace are these nations that are not very transparent, that hide behind the-that don't let… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
“He turned to her. “Didn’t you see the lightning strike the steeple?” She recovered with a sip of tea, then smiled sweetly.… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
In Sarvamangalam,' I am fond of flowers and I want to own a nursery. My character talks only to flowers. If she… — Shamna Kasim Copy Share Image
The humorous writer professes to awaken and direct your love, your pity, your kindness--your scorn for untruth, pretension, imposture…He takes upon himself… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I think I was born with a natural way of looking at something and trying to find the ways in which it… — Briga Heelan Copy Share Image
“It’s a little early in our relationship for us to be ‘surmounting,’ but, hey, I’m game if you are. I’ll even let… — Stacey Marie Brown Copy Share Image
I always get a little bit pissed off when stand-up comedy is not recognised as being as good a craft as being… — Jim Jefferies Copy Share Image
“His lectures were always well attended, and not just because he imparted so much wisdom and knowledge: he also managed to do… — Jeffrey Archer Copy Share Image
There are people that say you should never use humor to talk about anything that's important or hard, and since I don't… — Lizz Winstead Copy Share Image
“I glanced at George half naked in his towel, then at Barkley, completely naked in his . . . nothing. A vampire… — Michelle Rowen Copy Share Image
When they were naming vitamins they must have thought there were going to be way more vitamins than there ended up being.… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
No one set that I ever do is the same. I mean, if I go to a comedy club, and I perform… — Tracy Morgan Copy Share Image
“...You agreed we would be fearless together. I’m gonna need you to keep your promise,” Haley said a little loudly. Falon’s office… — Robin Alexander Copy Share Image
Horror is like comedy. Woody Allen's comedy is going to be very different from Ben Stiller's comedy which is going to be… — Eli Roth Copy Share Image