“Well, kid," Aahz said, sweeping me with an appraising stare, "it looks like we're stuck with each other. The setup isn't ideal,… — Robert Lynn Asprin Copy Share Image
Now, most of the time you couldn't be too sure of the quality of the drug. Although, in my experience the stuff… — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
“Mum says be careful of boys who never take anything seriously. Dad says a boy needs a good sense of humor to… — Cath Crowley Copy Share Image
“Just clip the red one," Cyrus told her. "They're all red," Erica informed him. "They are?" Cyrus asked. "Curse those Soviets! Everything… — Stuart Gibbs Copy Share Image
“I am tempted to incapacitate him with the hemlock and then castrate him.” Lena paled. “I don’t think that would be very… — Bec McMaster Copy Share Image
“I couldn't decide if he was four or nine or twelve. I had no idea of the specifics of children. He was… — Maggie Stiefvater Copy Share Image
But that was life: Nobody got a guided tour to their own theme park. You had to hop on the rides as… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“There was no question that Jorge 'Billy' Nayor liked to get high; he just didn't think of himself as a drug dealer… — Dinosaur in the Park Jorge Nayor Copy Share Image
Everybody is different. Some comedy is more musical like Steven Wright. His is a pillar of comedy to me. He invented a… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
“So does that mean we get Eric, too?" Willa said. "Because Eric is definitely hot, and if I had my choice I'd… — Ridley Pearson Copy Share Image
“I wonder where everyone is," she muttered. "Sleeping, if they have any idea what's good for them," Dunford replied acerbically. "I suppose… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
There are a lot of movies with vampires and monsters and super-great effects, but if there's no humor or human relations, I… — Harald Zwart Copy Share Image
Ontologically, chocolate raises profoundly disturbing questions: Does not chocolate offer natural revelation of the goodness of the Creator just as chilies disclose… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“While he’d been tentatively considering a possible romantic relationship with her, she’d fallen in love with him. He could barely speak. “Why… — Alisha Rai Copy Share Image
“Into the breach, then. Against mobs of middle-aged moms and frightening harridans we shall prevail.” She nodded sharply, raising an invisible sword.… — Patricia Briggs Copy Share Image
“I suppose I could get a job to have something to do, but working when I don't have to work would be… — Stephen Reid Andrews Copy Share Image
“I debated whether to tell them I had long since abandoned my writing career and moved into radishes and fraud, but decided… — Susan Juby Copy Share Image
If the first ‘Hangover’ movie were this awful, there never would have been a Part Two. This is a joyless, unfunny mix… — Mick LaSalle Copy Share Image
“Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always… — G.K. Chesterton Copy Share Image
“The silver car had been closing in, but just then, it took a sharp turn to the left. Where are they going?… — Zechariah Barrett Copy Share Image
“Why Banning Miller, what a vision you are in your fine dress. Must've taken a dozen slaves a dozen days to get… — Jane Espenson Copy Share Image
So much of comedy happens between your chin and your shoulders. Nobody tells you when you get your own TV show that… — Lennon Parham Copy Share Image
“I'm a duck farmer. Am I the world's best duck farmer? Probably not, but there's no official ranking, and I'm a modest… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“One," said the recording secretary. "Jesus wept," answered Leon promptly. There was not a sound in the church. You could almost hear… — Gene Stratton-Porter Copy Share Image
“Given the choice between eating this cupcake or watching Ryan Gosling and Jon Hamm wrestle each other for the privilege of having… — Lisa Kleypas Copy Share Image
“Move along,” Hines said. “Last room down.” I spotted a fish tank halfway down the aisle. Dug into my pocket. “Hi,” I… — Kathy Reichs Copy Share Image
“I've never seen Salisbury steak on a restaurant menu. It's only in frozen dinners. Is there something we should know about that?… — Kelli Jae Baeli Copy Share Image
“Harry — I think I've just understood something! I've got to go to the library!” And she sprinted away, up the stairs.… — J.K. Rowling Copy Share Image
“The men had scattered in all directions, which men are inclined to do when women leave them to their own devices for… — Elizabeth Peters Copy Share Image
“You're missing the wow factor." Garrett snickered. "Did you really just say wow factor ?" "Oh, whatever. What are you, twelve?" "Twelve… — Amanda Young Copy Share Image
There's a fallacy with stand up comedy, which is, people come up to comedians, and they go, 'You say what I think… — Jim Jefferies Copy Share Image
“Ohmigod! This place is so cool!” This was Tracy, who was sashaying into the warehouse looking around like she just hit the… — Kristen Ashley Copy Share Image
“I'll be sure not to let anyone but you carry me in her arms." He turns and leaves the kitchen before I… — Susan Ee Copy Share Image
“Isn't reduced brain damage a good thing?' asked Nathan. 'Oh, totally--I wish I had reduced brain damage, or at least, I wish… — Mira Grant Copy Share Image
“The almost egregiously English couple, Cedric and Rosamund Chailey, had slipped quietly away when the conversation turned to God. It had not… — Michael Frayn Copy Share Image
The Muppet Show is very much seen as an English thing. So for us in the U.K. it is one of the… — James Bobin Copy Share Image
“You remind me of an old cat I once had. Whenever he killed a mouse he would bring it into the drawing-room… — P.G. Wodehouse Copy Share Image
There's something really powerful about comedy. When the little guy, the comedian, punches up towards the big guy, or Trump, exposing him,… — Randy Rainbow Copy Share Image
“Friday was back to normal, if the actions of suspicious would-be heirs competing for a two-hundred-million-dollar prize could be considered normal.” — Ellen Raskin Copy Share Image
Every day is a surprise. There are confirmations of an interconnectivity and synchronicity which inspire, titillate and confirm the inherent comedy of… — Billy Zane Copy Share Image
