“That's No'-as-big-as-Medium-Sized-Jock-but-bigger-than-Wee-Jock-Jock, mistress,' said Not-as-big-as-Medium-Sized-Jock-but-bigger-than-Wee-Jock-Jock. 'Ye were one jock short,' he added helpfully.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“I don’t want to talk about it,” she said. Once again he was close. Too close. So damn close. “At all,” she… — Jill Shalvis Copy Share Image
“President Grant sent a note to Golden. The note read that there was a member of the stake presidency from Coalville, who… — James Kimball Copy Share Image
“This is where the privileged send their screwed-up progeny; no gluing macaroni to construction paper for us." He paused meaningfully. "They only… — Michelle Hodkin Copy Share Image
“So, what you're saying is that I bring out your book - wielding, short tempered side?" He hooked his foot through the… — Lani Woodland Copy Share Image
I do miss the rhythms of comedy. And I've never been able to perform very well without an audience. The sitcoms I've… — Dick Van Dyke Copy Share Image
“There is much in our culture to affront the eye of the fervent terrorist postulant, things out there that do us no… — David Rakoff Copy Share Image
“There are eight levels of wizardry on the Disc; after sixteen years Rincewind has failed to achieve even level one. In fact… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The Latin word for sausage was botulus, from which English gets two words. One of them is the lovely botuliform, which means… — Mark Forsyth Copy Share Image
“At first, writing actually felt the more arduous of the two activities. But in order to reach cultural-center nirvana, I forced myself… — Yu Hua Copy Share Image
Ah simple laughter that you trewing on my face. Is a simple karma that you will get for tomorrow.. Ah big clap… — Leodonessiony Copy Share Image
I look at my women with a Shakespearean element too - the variant of emotions they are capable of - it's not… — Miles Aldridge Copy Share Image
“Look, this is just the cemetery. It's got bylaws and things! It's not Transylvania! There's just dead people here! That doesn't make… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“A friend confided to me recently that she wasn't sure if it was the 'change,' plain old PMS, or just a slow… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
Voyeurism, watching people go about their daily lives, is universally funny, no matter the culture, no matter the anything, it's just always… — James Murray Copy Share Image
“Late twenties, single, female. Do the math. Flirty flings were fabulous until you hit the big three-O, all downhill from there. Biological… — Nicola Marsh Copy Share Image
Vanity was the beginning and the end of Sir Walter Elliot's character; vanity of person and of situation. He had been remarkably… — Jane Austen Copy Share Image
“You wouldn't think that people would believe that we all got so incredibly beat up—in so many interesting ways—from a bear attack.… — Kendare Blake Copy Share Image
“I felt offended. So offended that I planned to ignore for the next few weeks the "friends" who'd sent me those pictures.… — Gabourey Sidibe Copy Share Image
“As he was forced to tell his father more than once, “I said I’d fight for my mother’s throne. I never said… — G.A. Aiken Copy Share Image
“Tugs used to think that everyone's name was in the dictionary, and when she had realized it was only hers, both Tugs… — Anne Ylvisaker Copy Share Image
“Please consult your child’s Witch doctor before using this product. Diapers may cause severe allergies, internal bleeding, and irreversible sex change.” — Kenya Wright Copy Share Image
“I wish I had my beta-blockers handy. [ Comment when told that he had won a Nobel prize, referring to the drug… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect that life is no farce; that it is not genteel… — Henry James Sr Copy Share Image
Things have been invented because of alcohol. Like the taser, okay? Yeah! The morning after pill, okay? The reach-around. Judge Judy. What… — Dave Attell Copy Share Image
“Lassiter hit pause and clamped a hard hand on his shoulder."Sit the fuck back. Watch and learn." "What? How much I hate… — J.R. Ward Copy Share Image
It's funny, because I was trained as a dramatic actor at New York's Colonnades Theater Lab in the '70s, along with Jeff… — Peter Scolari Copy Share Image
“Now I know thinking is not your strong suit, but look on the bright side, at least you'll have this little puzzler… — Jessica Verdi Copy Share Image
“She couldn't or simply wouldn't understand why I wanted to sleep all the time, and she was always rubbing my nose in… — Ottessa Moshfegh Copy Share Image
“We all love Jamie too much to see him spend the rest of his life with only three decrepit old bags of… — Sangu Mandanna Copy Share Image
“Risa: I love you! Otani: I know. Risa: And... you love me too, right, Otani? Otani: Yeah. Crowd: *cheers* Good job, buddy!… — Atsushi Otani and Koizumi Risa Copy Share Image
Well, I’m not kissing the mundane," said Jace. "I’d rather stay down here and rot." "Forever?" said Simon. "Forever’s an awfully long… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
I have good kids, I love my kids. I try to bring them up the right way, not spanking them. I find… — Denis Leary Copy Share Image
“My mind didn't clear. It had been clear before. Instead it muddled, suddenly ablaze with rioting factions of insecurities and dreams, a… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“NOTICE Persons attempting to find a "text" in this book will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a "subtext" in this book… — Wendell Berry Copy Share Image
“Have you anything that is ready to wear today? I'd like nothing better than to be rid of that thing she has… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
Mutations are exciting. They try to fix 'em when they come out. Did you see the two-headed baby they killed last month… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
I have a country-boy sense of humor. I come from a poor family, and I have no education. But I am Middle… — Hal Needham Copy Share Image
I think that even in a drama, we all want to smile, and laugh because what a horrible life if we're just… — David Koechner Copy Share Image
“Thanks to my mother, I was raised to have a morbid imagination. When I was a child, she often talked about death… — Amy Tan Copy Share Image