What comes after the letter T? Normal people: U. Me: Wait.. A,B,C,D,E,F,G.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I sense a humor. I sense a wise fact. I sense the humorous to be a wise choice of the fact. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I don't stalk. I just update myself on what's going on in people's lives. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
humor can get in under the door while seriousness is still fumbling at the handle — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I heard his library burned down and both books were destroyed -- and one of them hadn't even been colored in yet.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Vanity might be a "sin" according to some lights, but he thought in measured doses it was one of life's allowable simple… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I want to show you that you can be funny and hot. You can drink and read. People are still getting used… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Incidentally, I don't know how late you were planning to stay, but there is an excellent film this evening The Snake Pit… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Why do single girls take advice from other single girls? That's like ray charles giving stevie wonder driving directions. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Laughter is like a fresh new day, each giggle is the dawn of a new morning; brighten up your day and smile… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The most valuable sense of humor is the kind that enables a person to see instantly what it isn't safe to laugh… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Admit It. When you shut the lights off in the basement, you get out of there...fast! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you're a tool. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Found my son and his girlfriend naked in his room...sex-ed is so advanced now, they also give homework. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm scared to have children because I can't imagine creating something more needy than myself. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Money can't buy happiness, but it's a lot more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when your iPhone battery lasts longer than most relationships these days. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Afinal, o que eu quero da vida? A resposta é a mais estúpida e genial possível: eu quero viver.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and it's half empty. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don't know. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When somebody says 'It's getting hot in here' I automatically think, 'So take off all your clothes.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If my boss paid me in Trident Layers, I'd probably have to kick his ass. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That laughter costs too much which is purchased by the sacrifice of decency. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share
Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer… — Anonymous Copy Share
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share
The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,… — Anonymous Copy Share
