I'm in love with a lot of things. Some of those things love me back. And some of them don't--and one of… — Guy Berryman Copy Share Image
Don't let anything stop you. There will be times when you'll be disappointed, but you can't stop. Make yourself the best that… — Sadie Tanner Mossell Alexander Copy Share Image
Every hairstyle I have is funny because my barber is a standup comedian by the slightly unfortunate name of Paul Sweeney. His… — Joe Lycett Copy Share Image
Dumb ass people who think it's funny to make fun of someone who don't talk much like really just remember the quite… — Any Copy Share Image
“Let me be clear: I don’t want to make love to a mannequin—I want to make love like a mannequin. Oh, if… — Dark Jar Tin Zoo Copy Share Image
A lot of people who do drama say comedy is the hardest thing, but, not wanting to sound like a bighead, comedy… — Nick Frost Copy Share Image
I'm not disciplined at all. I barely function. But I get a lot done. I take days off all the time, but… — Simon Sebag Montefiore Copy Share Image
Sometimes there's a tackiness about Route 66 that out-tacks any tackiness I've ever seen anywhere else. And the Meramec Caverns are the… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
You're in a relationship to be happy, to smile, to laugh, to make memories. not to constantly be upset, hurting and crying.. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A Fool will love thrice at a joke, 1. When others are laughing (2) when he knows its a joke (3) and… — Agbessi Charles Copy Share Image
“I picked up the nearest weapon I could lay my hands on: a stapler. I lifted it, going for “menacing.” I admit… — Rachel Hawkins Copy Share Image
I find it so funny how people that don't write the music, and have no involvement in it, can make such huge… — Cher Lloyd Copy Share Image
A great deal of the pupils time was spent going through, once again, the History of the Communist (Bolshevik) Party of the… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
“The sun weeps because it can no longer caress your skin or warm your lips." He sifted his fingers through my hair.… — Michele Bardsley Copy Share Image
It's funny because I think that both France and Britain are known for their distinctive styles, and everyone says that France is… — Alexa Chung Copy Share Image
Opening for Louis C.K. during his "Hilarious" tour was a great experience for me. He is the generation just ahead of me,… — Ted Alexandro Copy Share Image
“Some disabled people spend a significant amount of their energy on trying to come across as abled or as not that disabled.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“I’ve never been bothered with my conduct. I’ve only been bothered by people that don’t get it correct when they gossip about… — Shannon L. Alder Copy Share Image
When they say I'll think about it, what they really mean is, I'll forget about it completely until you bring it up… — Timzing Lakan Copy Share Image
Japan has a low crime rate, unless you count the fact that approximately every fifteen minutes the entire Cabinet gets indicted for… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Let me make you an offer, little goat. We spar. If you lose, my cap is returned to me, unburnt. I continue… — Holly Black Copy Share Image
“I might have hasked a question..., except that 1. I didn't know what it was, and 2. I didn't care to learn,… — John Green Copy Share Image
“The fifth, in a rumpled plaid suit and plastic devil mask, plunked a ukulele. Even without the Satan-head mask, I realized Hawaii… — T.M. Goeglein Copy Share Image
My walk. Let's clarify this: you're not allowed to laugh at my walk but I am. Most times I am in control… — Rosie Jones Copy Share Image
I spend money with reckless abandon. Last month I blew $5000 at a reincarnation. I got to thinking, what the hell, you… — Ronnie Shakes Copy Share Image
Fear not; the things that you are afraid of are quite likely to happen to you, but they are nothing to be… — John Macmurray Copy Share Image
The things that make me laugh are considered smart or whatever, I guess. But stuff that's self-consciously intelligent or self-consciously hip or… — Greg Giraldo Copy Share Image
Hilarious. Ugly Face. Reminds me of the setuffd animal I had as a kid I named Floppy Neck. I could twist that… — Benjamin Copy Share Image
The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
In this scene, I'm talking about how much I don't like cookies… I'm sayin', 'Listen, guys. Have you read the book? We're… — Robert Pattinson Copy Share Image
“I’m talking about you, you idiot. You have seen you, right?” [...] “Of course I have. I saw myself last Wednesday. My… — Charlotte Stein Copy Share Image
If I ever complain to an agent about anything, he always has a pained look on his face, like, "How can you… — Mickey Rooney Copy Share Image
Stop waiting around for Prince Charming. Get up and go find him, the poor idiot is probably stuck in a tree somewhere...haha:) — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Suddenly, however, the dastardly department of my personality presented two plans, one of which involved dynamite, mustache wax, some rope, and train… — Laurie Notaro Copy Share Image
“The room fell silent. I frankly didn't know what I was going to do to help Eduardo, but I had the sense… — Tod Goldberg Copy Share Image
Woman say:CAN'T WE JUST BE FRIENDS? Woman means:There is no way I'm going to let any part of your body touch any… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You want to be able to really tackle a character and make it a fully-dimensional human being who is complicated, funny, and… — Viola Davis Copy Share Image
“Honestly, as much as I love my brother, I’m not sure how I feel about him hanging out in your bedroom.” He… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“She wasn't a prude. Not really. She liked sex a lot. More now than she had ten minutes ago, to be perfectly… — Maisey Yates Copy Share Image
If I find something funny or something that kind of cracks me up, I'll get up on stage. I don't care what… — Jo Koy Copy Share Image