Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence. — Andy Borowitz Copy Share Image
The sacredness, if there is any, is all in yourself and not in the place. — Henry David Thoreau Copy Share Image
As our leader Saddam Hussein said, 'God is grilling their stomachs in hell.' — Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf Copy Share Image
I would rather get out of the game than stay in the game to change the game. — Danielle LaPorte Copy Share Image
The awful daring of a moment's surrender which an age of prudence can never retract. — TS Eliot Copy Share Image
He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend - provided, of course, that he really is dead. — Voltaire Copy Share Image
If you are truly offended by an 80-year-old man saying you're not funny, then you're probably not funny. — Sarah Silverman Copy Share Image
It is good to act as if. It is even better to grow to the point where it is no longer an… — Charles Caleb Colton Copy Share Image
The funny thing about my films is that you can make little piles of them. You could make little piles of the… — Julianne Moore Copy Share Image
This policeman came up to me with a pencil and a piece of very thin paper. He said, "I want you to… — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
I'm a funny guy. I want people to laugh. I laugh at myself, I make fun of myself. But at the end… — Lil B Copy Share Image
“Man I’m hot,” I exclaimed, fanning myself. The combination of climbing out of the cave and the sun meant that I was… — Adele Rose Copy Share Image
Joey: Beth is really sick, I don't think they can do anything for her. Rachel: Joey, wanna put the book in the… — Friends Copy Share Image
In my forthcoming movie 'Jerry,' I play a funny character, where there is scope for me to perform. I hope people would… — Mumtaj Copy Share Image
Fencing is a funny sport. Competitive fencing is not really very applicable to the stage world unless you're fighting with a rapier… — Kris Holden-Ried Copy Share Image
They are not testing comics for drugs. If our job is dependent on that, there would be three working comics in the… — Marc Maron Copy Share Image
Our memories, they can be inviting. But some are altogether, mighty frightening. — Gwen Stefani Copy Share Image
There is no beauty, if it doesn't show some of the terribleness of life. — Marlene Dumas Copy Share Image
A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future. — Denis Waitley Copy Share Image
The funny thing is that I feel close to all my characters. Deep, deep inside them all. — Paul Auster Copy Share Image
They've taken the foot off Johnny Grubb. Uh, they've taken the shoe off Johnny Grubb. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
The deeper interior you have the more you have in your llibrary. — Jacqueline Bisset Copy Share Image
“Laser light flickered all over him as if he was a packet of biscuits at a super-market check-out.” — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
The greatest unsolved theorem in mathematics is why some people are better at it than others. — Adrian Mathesis Copy Share Image
It's normal to feel the way you do right now but trust me, it will get better. Good luck, be strong. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Always walk towards open doors. And if they slam shut in your face, kick that sucker in and keep going. — Richard Gere Copy Share Image
2-in-1 is a stupid term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That's why 2 was created. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late. — Max Kauffmann Copy Share Image
Maybe you should post wants attentions as your status cause I don't think people are getting your drift. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
No matter what I have to say, I'm still trying to say it in comedic form. — Harold Ramis Copy Share Image
We have...dragons. Most people would leave. Not us. We're Vikings. We have, stubbornness issues. — Hiccup Copy Share Image
