You'll like Inception if you like movies about characters trying to explain what Inception is about. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Every match I go into, I'm the huge favorite. I lose a set and it's, like, crazy. — Roger Federer Copy Share Image
The walk of shame when you have to put something back in a store after your mom says no. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“A red eight-sided sign always means: A) Stop. B) Go. C) Danger! Red octogons ahead!” — Cuthbert Soup Copy Share Image
Funny how someone telling you not to do something can talk you into it. — Richelle Mead Copy Share Image
I don't think you can teach people how to be funny. You can make suggestions about how to speak a line or… — George Cukor Copy Share Image
If pre-marital sex amounts to marriage, then it is the only wedding which is not attended by any of the relatives! — Punkinhead Abhishek Copy Share Image
“I just called you corny and said you were wearing a green dress. That's, like, the least flirtatious thing anyone's ever said."… — Claire LaZebnik Copy Share Image
“Millions of sane people would each be sexually attracted to their own parent or child if they were not related to them.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Don DeLillo's 'White Noise,' which I read when I was 19. It showed me that a book can be funny as hell… — Kevin Barry Copy Share Image
“He picked up the sketchbook, turning it so she could see his work - a gorgeous rendition of a stone bridge they'd… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
It doesn't bother me that you don't like me, what bothers me is that you are hypocritical and PRETEND to like me. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Come on, you guys. I know you want to line up to hug this motherfucker here. Don’t be shy. My awesomeness is… — Tijan Copy Share Image
Life is a dance between making it happen and letting it happen. — Arianna Huffington Copy Share Image
The biggest commitment you must keep is your commitment to yourself. — Neale Donald Walsch Copy Share Image
What a father says to his children is not heard by the world, but it will be heard by posterity. — Jean Paul Copy Share Image
Whatever your orientation is, it is working on everything around you. — John de Ruiter Copy Share Image
Just once, I would like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear...'Monday has been canceled, go back to sleep.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can't please everyone, but you can piss them all off at the same time! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives. — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
To bring anything really to life in literature we can't be lifelike: we have to be literature-like — Northrop Frye Copy Share Image
Like I always say, there's no 'I' in team. There is a 'me', though, if you jumble it up. — David Shore Copy Share Image
I suddenly realized I was racing around so much, I could never catch up with my life — Pico Iyer Copy Share Image
Someone told me that when they go to Vermont, they feel like they're home. I'm that way at Saks. — Caroline Rhea Copy Share Image
I wish they made fajita cologne, because that stuff smells good. What's that you're wearing? That's sizzlin'! — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
The East End of Glasgow is like the Olympics. Lots of foriegners in tracksuits struggling to speak English. — Frankie Boyle Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when you finish an article and need to save but press Cancel Button. — Mak_786 Copy Share Image
“A woman is always better in everything with the mouth; she talks a lot.” — M.F. Moonzajer Copy Share Image
