Alarms Quote by P. J. O'Rourke

I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the home of…

— P. J. O'Rourke

“Since nobody reacts to car alarms anymore, stop putting alarms in cars. Face it. At this point, car alarms are like Glenn Beck: annoying,…

— Bill Maher

John Ford was so funny that I couldn't wait to go to work in the morning.

— Richard Widmark

When I used to see Rick Moranis do something, to me that was immediately funny. Or George Carlin or Martin Lawrence.

— Fred Armisen

“A detective pulled me aside yesterday for a private word. He looks at me with my two black eyes and says, 'Just tell me…

— Judy Melinek

“So you need an alarm system because you gonna be in bad neighborhoods?" "Actually, I sort of stole a car, and I'm afraid the…

— Janet Evanovich

“Years later, on a Steve Jobs discussion board on the website Gawker, the following tale appeared from someone who had worked at the Whole…

— Walter Isaacson

I remember watching an episode of 'Seinfeld' in which George can't understand why security guards can't sit down. He gets obsessed with it and…

— David Baddiel

I had seen movies before that that had made me laugh, but I had never seen anything even remotely close to as funny as…

— Joe Rogan

He put on his hat and wrapped his scarf around his jaw, but did without the wig and the sunglasses. He clicked his key…

— Derek Landy

The jokes were perfect! Then George Carlin started talking about the seven dirty words you can't say on television, then it evolved into social…

— Jay Mohr

I guess what I always found funny was the human condition. There is a certain comedy and pathos to trouble and accidents. Like, when…

— John Prine