Dirty Quote by Chelsea Handler

“If you do talk dirty, make sure that you enunciate because there's nothing more embarrassing than having to repeat yourself.”

Chelsea Handler

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I love people who have such passion for complete nonsense.

Chelsea Handler

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I think the people I talk about are generally so stupid that they don't even know I'm saying bad things about them. I've run…

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At some point during almost every romantic comedy, the female lead suddenly trips and falls, stumbling helplessly over something ridiculous like a leaf, and…

Chelsea Handler

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A federal grand jury is investigating allegations that David Copperfield raped, assaulted and threatened a woman he took to his private island in the…

Chelsea Handler

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It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to be. If someone is…

Chelsea Handler

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“My mother agreed to aid my abuse of alcohol but only if I promised never to tell my newly converted Mormon sister, whose identity…

Chelsea Handler

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I try to not overthink anything. I don't understand why nipples are nudity. Who cares? Men can show their nipples but if we have…

Chelsea Handler

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Seeing your mother naked is not something you easily recover from. Seeing your mother naked and jumping from one side of a king-sized bed…

Chelsea Handler

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I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.

Chelsea Handler

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I can remember my first one-night stand like it was yesterday. Well, maybe not the first. Or the second¦ or the fifth. Ill just…

Chelsea Handler

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“It was quite obvious that without severe behavior modification, this boy would grow up to be a serial killer.”

Chelsea Handler

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Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it with a single dolphin made me want to burn…

Chelsea Handler

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I'm a film guy. I love it. When I read the screenplay, I knew that there would be no HD camera that could achieve…

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Whenever we touch nature we get clean. People who have got dirty through too much civilization take a walk in the woods, or a…

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Just between you and me, shouldn’t the World Bank be encouraging MORE migration of the dirty industries to the LDCs [Less Developed Countries]?... I…

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Who gets to be best-liked in any community? Who is the most trusted? Why, the man who does the dirty job, of course, and…

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I remember being a kid and seeing the 'National Inquirer' at the grocery store checkout line. When somebody actually picked up a copy, it…

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Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.

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Staring at the blank page before you, Open up the dirty window, Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find.

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I'm supportive of women, absolutely, and it's so gratifying to have girls come up and say, 'I'm really inspired by your guitar playing.' I…

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Mr. Bumpy from Bump in the Night was this funky little guy who lived under the bed and thought eating dust bunnies was a…

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My hair is naturally blond and thin, so I like to give it some texture. Sexy, dirty bedhead is good for blonds.

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Good guys need to be a little dirty otherwise they're just boring.

Vincent Cassel

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Dirty Quote by Chelsea Handler

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