Way Quotes by Craig Ferguson

12 Way quotes by Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson’s dry humor shines in these twelve observations about life’s direction, giving readers a chuckle while nudging them toward thoughtful self‑reflection.

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Anyway, if you needed something really dangerous, get a gun. It's easy, it's cheap, and it's the American way.

Craig Ferguson

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She still cared for me, and the best way I could make amends to her was to be happy. I do have…

Craig Ferguson

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I like football. I find its an exciting strategic game. Its a great way to avoid conversation with your family at Thanksgiving.

Craig Ferguson

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…maybe fear is God's way of saying, "Pay attention, this could be fun.

Craig Ferguson

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The views expressed by Me are in no way endorsed by CBS any of its allied companies or in fact Me.

Craig Ferguson

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They were singing, Gillette, the best a man can get, with a lot of guys hugging their fathers and sailing and riding…

Craig Ferguson

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I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if…

Craig Ferguson

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The virus in the movie 'Contagion' is based on the bird flu which came out of nowhere back in 2008. Everyone thought…

Craig Ferguson

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I salute Rick Perry for the way he's trying to overcome this. Today he came out and said he's not one of…

Craig Ferguson

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Ratings experts say the best way to get people to watch during sweeps is to leave the audience with a question that…

Craig Ferguson

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Former president George W. Bush released his new memoir. By the way, 'memoir' is just a fancy word for 'a bunch of…

Craig Ferguson

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Pies were invented 12,000 years ago by the Egyptians. It was an easy way to preserve food that would be carried over…

Craig Ferguson

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“I was ambitious and desperate to direct my first film, so I capitulated and blew it. Never again. Never fucking again.”

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Sometimes people think you’re smart if you question the status quo, if nothing else.

Craig Ferguson

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Sober alkies are often asked: "When did you hit rock bottom?" but a more informed question might be: "How many times did you hit…

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Remember the band, Flock of Seagulls? They had their van stolen. I was like, They still have a van?

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People spend thousands of dollars trying to keep their teeth straight. I just hope we can live in a world where we accept gay…

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Whoever I had become had to die.

Craig Ferguson

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My pilot's license. I'm proud of that.

Craig Ferguson

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People are saying that Anderson Cooper could be the new Oprah. And then these people are struck by lightning.

Craig Ferguson

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I think comedy comes more from a low sense of self-esteem, and I certainly have that.

Craig Ferguson

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I'm so excited about the new iPad, I just iPeed my iPants.

Craig Ferguson

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For my birthday that year Anne gave me an inflatable atlas globe, along with a birthday card in which she wrote: I give you…

Craig Ferguson

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114 isn't as old as it used to be they say its the new 104.

Craig Ferguson

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I have to do a show which is of interest to me, or else I'm lost.

Craig Ferguson

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The first ads for medical marijuana have started airing on television in California. The ads are quite expensive. It costs a lot of money…

Craig Ferguson

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I wanted to be a rock star.

Craig Ferguson

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