“A brick could be used as a time travel device. I didn’t say it would work well, and you’d say it didn’t… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I’m a guy who respects boundaries. I require a passport for interpersonal travel.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I carry a little plastic tub with me, and I put my most valuable possessions in them—my means of travel, which are… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“When traveling, most people want fast and safe. But if slow and dangerous is your thing, have you considered a hot-air balloon?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Sleeping in a tinfoil suit keeps me warmer and helps prepare me for my voyage to the moon. Would you care for… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I put two bricks side by side in the grass and called it a race. Neither one moved so I renamed it… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Renaldina told Renaldo and Renaldo told me, so that’s two points for possible miscommunication, especially when you consider that she’s deaf and… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
