School Quotes by David Sedaris

12 School quotes by David Sedaris

Sedaris’ observational humor finds a niche in the school setting, and these twelve lines capture his quirky take on teachers, exams, and the oddities of student life. A short, enjoyable read for fans of his style.

Rate this collection: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet

I like high school and college writing textbooks and find them very helpful. Whenever I'm stuck and seem to have no ideas,…

David Sedaris

Image

If I'm riding my bike I just replay the same scenarios over and over in my head, like I haven't had a…

David Sedaris

Image

“I’m sad to be finishing school. I liked being in college. It was respectable to be a student. You get discount admissions…

David Sedaris

Image

My first semester I had only nine students. Hoping they might view me as professional and well prepared, I arrived bearing name…

David Sedaris

Image

I hated leaving a hole in the smoking world, and so I recruited someone to take my place. People have given me…

David Sedaris

Image

When asked "What do we need to learn this for?" any high-school teacher can confidently answer that, regardless of the subject, the…

David Sedaris

Image

High school taught me a valuable lesson about glasses: Don't wear them. Contacts have always seemed like too much work, so instead…

David Sedaris

Image

And one of the things I noticed pretty early on in art school was that my classmates had no notion of an…

David Sedaris

Image

As I searched the atlas for somewhere to run to, Hugh made a case for his old stomping grounds. His first suggestion…

David Sedaris

Image

I was first published in the newspaper put out by School of The Art Institute of Chicago, where I was a student.…

David Sedaris

Image

There's no such thing as a folk writer. There's no such thing as somebody who's never read a book before suddenly sitting…

David Sedaris

Image

I would start by writing to an adult, maybe a high school teacher, or maybe an aunt or uncle, and writing and…

David Sedaris

Image

Other authors on School

More by David Sedaris

“Plenty of animals had pets, but few were more devoted than the mouse, who owned a baby corn snake—“A rescue snake, she’d be quick…

David Sedaris

Image

“never fall asleep in a Dumpster, never underestimate a bee, never drive a convertible behind a flatbed truck, never get old, never get drunk…

David Sedaris

Image

“It was a father, one hand resting teapot-style on his hip, and the other - what would be the spout - formed into a…

David Sedaris

Image

“A Japanese woman we’d met in Paris came to the apartment yesterday and spent several hours explaining our appliances. The microwave, the water kettle,…

David Sedaris

Image

One thing I like about the United States, and I kind of miss about the United States, is there's an election coming up here…

David Sedaris

Image

When you read comic material and people aren't laughing how do you know they're listening.

David Sedaris

Image

“You have how many children in your family?" the teacher would ask. "I'm guessing you must be Catholic, am I right?”

David Sedaris

Image

“Like most seasoned phonies, I roundly suspect that everyone is as disingenuous as I am.”

David Sedaris

Image

As a child I assumed that when I reached adulthood, I would have grown-up thoughts.

David Sedaris

Image

“You just take and take don´t you? Out there with your thumb in the air—not a care in the world, just grabbing whatever you…

David Sedaris

Image

In other parts of the country people tried to stay together for the sake of the children. In New York they tried to work…

David Sedaris

Image

My boyfriend got me a computer three years ago. I'll admit it does make things a lot easier. When I was working on a…

David Sedaris

Image

I spent months searching for some secret code before I realized that common sense has nothing to do with it. Hysteria, psychosis, torture, depression:…

David Sedaris