“I am the red wheelbarrow of communism. William Carlos Williams wrote a poem about me.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I sell black markers on the black market. I am personally responsible for 50% of all truck stop urinal poetry.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I’d Poe’s nude for the approval of a dead poet. No names come to mind, but I’m sure there must be one… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Poe is to poetry what I am to duck farming. You can quote me on that. And if that’s not good enough,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I submitted a poem last night to The New Yorker. They said it can take up to three months to hear back.… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I think the perfect pen name is Quill McSeagull. Especially for writing flights of fancy—and nothing has more feathers than a love… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If I ever see an alien fishing in Scotland, and witness it catching the Loch Ness Monster, I’d probably assume the world… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If I were stranded in the woods with nothing to eat but nuts, berries, and the complete works of Allen Ginsberg, I’d… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I wish I had eyes that changed colors from blue to gray, and then after I cried, to all the colors of… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
