I love funny people, and when I'm with funny people, or people who are amusing in their weirdness, I love it. Because… — Paul Feig Copy Share Image
I always felt that I was more of an actress than a - I can't tell a joke to save my soul,… — Carol Burnett Copy Share Image
The reasons I never set out to do a talk show is they're formulaic. People come out, tell jokes and read questions.… — Harry Connick, Jr Copy Share Image
My own personal rule is to tell jokes that I think the person I'm making them about can laugh at, to go… — Jeff Ross Copy Share Image
If somebody accuses you in a story of being a crook, you can demand that they prove it. But if a comic… — Robert Orben Copy Share Image
Some of them relate to farts but they are not fart jokes. They would just be a fart in the joke but… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
My whole life is a practical joke. Every evening and every show has really become about entertaining me. I was always like… — Howie Mandel Copy Share Image
I think one of my first jokes - in the black community, there's people who have jokes about skin tone. People like,… — Hannibal Buress Copy Share Image
Like everyone is either, "I grew up with it," or "I loved it," or loved them now. And when you watch The… — Nicholas Stoller Copy Share Image
I always make this joke that I know you were expecting to see the big skirts and the hoops. But that was… — Jody Watley Copy Share Image
Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports… — Babloo Copy Share Image
I use a lot of humor, and I follow the saying that if you want to tell people the truth, you better… — Sayed Kashua Copy Share Image
I'm not a man who constantly thinks up jokes. But I think it's very important to be able to see the funny… — Pope Benedict XVI Copy Share Image
You can be merry with the king, you can share a joke with him. But as Thomas More used to say, it's… — Hilary Mantel Copy Share Image
Writers tend to hate recurring characters; there's this writer snob thing about it. But I don't have that. I feel like the… — Ana Gasteyer Copy Share Image
Some days I feel like everyone in my world has plugged themselves into my kidney. I'm so tired. But when you're having… — Gwyneth Paltrow Copy Share Image
I saw a man at the beach screaming, 'Help, shark, help!' I laughed because I knew the shark wasn't going to help… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You remember from watching the show, there are no "jokes." That's why if you see people on Twitter accusing me of being… — Jay Mohr Copy Share Image
I had a couple of decent laughs on Townies, but for the most part, delivering a joke that you just know is… — Eric McCormack Copy Share Image
Every time a woman makes herself laugh at her husband's often-told jokes she betrays him. The man who looks at his woman… — Germaine Greer Copy Share Image
Awards shows have devolved into self-parodies - liberals in limos, corny insider jokes delivered by the hosts among bad teleprompter reading from… — John Ridley Copy Share Image
Everyone for the most part is really nice. There have always been jokes, but that's part of being in the spotlight. You… — Tina Yothers Copy Share Image
I will never joke about old soldiers who try to get to reunions to talk over the war again. To talk of… — Will Rogers Copy Share Image
BLONDNESS-okay 5 blondes go into a club theirs 2 dirty blondes and 3 bleach blondes and then they see 2 other blondes… — Unkown Copy Share Image
A joke is a good camouflage. Next best comes sentiment... But the best camouflage of all - in my opinion - is… — Max Frisch Copy Share Image
I learned as a young man that I don't write jokes, but that I can deliver more mundane material and get a… — Nick Offerman Copy Share Image
The nature of comedy is 'just do it.' But I think what's interesting about it is this joke has been around and… — Bob Saget Copy Share Image
On stage you look much larger than you are. You can have subtle changes of timing; how you place a punchline in… — Sylvester McCoy Copy Share Image
We adore babies because they're so cute. And, of course, we are amused by jokes because they are funny. This is all… — Daniel Dennett Copy Share Image
Making jokes is about the most wrong and stupid thing a bemused, middle-aged, white heterosexual Anglo Saxon sort of Celt Australian male… — Michael Leunig Copy Share Image
As the joke goes, you don’t have to be faster than the wolf chasing you, just faster than everyone else running away. — Kim Harrison Copy Share Image
Joke I read somewhere: They say that God is the innermost dweller of all. Well I hope He likes enchiladas - cause… — Meher Baba Copy Share Image
I recently did the David Letterman Show about my book. He was very serious and made no jokes and it caught me… — Bob Woodward Copy Share Image
'Where's Bill going?' He's going to comedy death. Boom! He pops out of it with another joke. It's my particular style. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Don't Take It Seriously * When the SHARE BROKER says, It will rise right up, fluctuate for a while and then slowly… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The Soviet Union represents a threat in terms of might. It is a joke in terms of its economy and what it… — Jack Kemp Copy Share Image
The thing about Donald [Trump] is the jokes write themselves. I don't even think of it to be trolling. What he says… — Chrissy Teigen Copy Share Image
My first job was selling doors, door to door. That's a tough job isn't it? Bing Bong; Hello, can I interest you… — Bill Bailey Copy Share Image
The fact that the Kardashians could be more popular than a show like 'Mad Men' is disgusting. It's a super disgusting part… — Jonah Hill Copy Share Image
Often when you're filming comedy and you've done six or seven takes, the joke's been done and you know you're gonna have… — Jim Howick Copy Share Image