Funny Quotes by Ritu Ghatourey · Page 6

The great question...which I have not been able to answer... is, "What...does a woman want?"

— Ritu Ghatourey

What I like the most about you is that you can make me laugh, when nothing's even funny.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Virginity is not the dignity; its just a lack of opportunity.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Boy: Hey, I think a crayon raped your face? Oh wait, never mind, that's your makeup.

— Ritu Ghatourey

If you think experts are expensive . . . wait and see what amateurs cost you.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Please dont leave me alone with your parents if I'm at your house

— Ritu Ghatourey

Whenever I have a problem, I sing. Then I realize that my voice is a lot worse than my problem.

— Ritu Ghatourey

He's funny. He's adorable. He's sweet, loving. He's awesome. He's perfect. I didn't say a name but he popped into your head,…

— Ritu Ghatourey

Today, I saw a crocodile eating a wild buffalo on Discovery. Bullshit!! We all know it's fake. Crocodiles eat Alpenliebe

— Ritu Ghatourey

Dentist: *Pokes gums with sharp pointy instrument of death* Dentist: Your gums are bleeding because you don't floss.

— Ritu Ghatourey

It recently became apparent to me that the letters 'T' and 'G' are far too close together on a keyboard. This is…

— Ritu Ghatourey

Im going to lose weight. Im going to exercise everyday. Im going on a diet and Ill stick to it. Hey, is…

— Ritu Ghatourey

One of the great regrets in my life is that I suffered so many assholes so gladly for so many years, all…

— Ritu Ghatourey

If you ever think youve made bad decisions just remember what it must feel like to be one of the 12 publishers…

— Ritu Ghatourey

So... the elephant says to the camel why do you have 2 boobs on your back? the camel replies that's a pretty…

— Ritu Ghatourey

Lack of sleep can lead to an increased desire for sex and substance abuse

— Ritu Ghatourey

I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone

— Ritu Ghatourey

My Family loves me sooo much . they call me a disaster :D

— Ritu Ghatourey

My computer is basically useless When it's not connected to the Internet.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Sitting at Home: Oh. It's raining. Cool. Sitting at School: HOLY CRAP IT'S RAINING!! LOOK!

— Ritu Ghatourey

My sarcasm only gets me in trouble when my brain-to-mouth filter is malfunctioning

— Ritu Ghatourey

Immature is a word that boring people use to describe fun people.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Student sent a telegram to his Father: NO MONEY, NO FUN, -UR SON. Father replied, HOW SAD, TOO BAD,-UR DAD

— Ritu Ghatourey

I support cloning. After all, I cant be everywhere at once when I rule the world.

— Ritu Ghatourey

When youre at someones house: Normal people: What a lovely house! Me: Whats your wifi password?

— Ritu Ghatourey

I'm in a relationship with sleep and I get some every night... and if I'm lucky, I get some during the day

— Ritu Ghatourey

I f u feel like doing some work, sit down n relax till that feeling goes away!!!

— Ritu Ghatourey

Interrupt my sleep and I'll interrupt your breathing. as simple as that xP

— Ritu Ghatourey

The four most important words in any marriage...'Ill do the dishes.'

— Ritu Ghatourey

I used to eat lots of natural foods until I learnt that most people die of natural causes.

— Ritu Ghatourey

I'm not lazy. Someone just stole my motivation. I'm the victim here!

— Ritu Ghatourey

The sentence which bring smile on women face 'You've lost so much of weight

— Ritu Ghatourey

For Real Men, a drunk girl is a responsibility Not an opportunity.

— Ritu Ghatourey

If love is the answer, can you please repeat the question?

— Ritu Ghatourey

I hate buses, they run twice faster when you are after it and too slow when you are in it..!!

— Ritu Ghatourey

Theres no such thing as insomnia. Just a lot of people with Internet access.

— Ritu Ghatourey

Is proud of his/herself. She finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years.

— Ritu Ghatourey

I hate when people assume shit. Just ask me & I'll tell you.

— Ritu Ghatourey

I hate it when TV shows add background laughter when its not even funny..!!

— Ritu Ghatourey