Funny Quotes · Page 39

While their service is ending, our responsibility is just beginning!

— Howard Schultz

Life without rules is like a bride without wearing jewellery

— Ritu Ghatourey

Don't give up now. ;)

— Anonymous

I'm hunting for little Mexican girls.

— Karl Malone

How much we like ourselves governs our performance.

— Brian Tracy

I could lose so much weight if I just switched to red wine from eight beers.

— Green Monk

Leadership is like beauty - it's hard to define but you know it when you see it.

— Warren G. Bennis

It's so funny, this thing of 'overnight success.' I've been doing this for 20 years, but yes, sure, it happened overnight!

— Brett Goldstein

What’s wrong with denouncing white interlopers?

— Al Sharpton

There's nothing in your life you can't learn from, if you respond with the right attitude.

— Rick Warren

I'm a funny guy. I want people to laugh. I laugh at myself, I make fun of myself. But at the end…

— Lil B

Experience precedes understanding.

— Jean Piaget

When I first saw 'Broken' Matt Hardy, I thought to myself, 'Umm...' I actually said to Jeremy Borash 'Why is he talking…

— Gail Kim

I worry about my nan. If she's alone and falls, does she make a noise? I'm joking, she's dead.

— Jimmy Carr

Its funny how you meet your ex and feel you've met a stranger who knows so much about you

— Ritu Ghatourey

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel: Has been through war, doesn't make the same mistakes twice; takes care of business.

— Nikhil Saluja

I don't think I said a single funny thing in class between 2004 and 2008.

— Ivo Graham

The best day to propose to a girl is on April Fools Day. If she says yes, then good. But, if she…

— Green Monk

I can't get divorced because I'm a Catholic. Catholics don't get divorced. They stay together through anger and hatred and festering misery,…

— Lenny Clarke

If a man falls down and gets up, it's funny. If he falls down and doesn't get up it's not funny.

— Soupy Sales

I've tried a lot of things in the off-season, but the only thing I really know is baseball.

— Hank Aaron

Unfortunately, propaganda works.

— Andy Rooney

The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.

— Bertrand Russell

It's money. I remember it from when I was single

— Billy Crystal

My biggest strength is that no one can read my forehand

— Sania Mirza