Why do we spend so much money on clothes when the best moments of our life are spent without them? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I swapped my neighbor's newspaper with last years newspaper from the same date. He didn't even notice! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
To understand a woman, you have to listen to her when she is looking at you, not when she is talking... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
People don't come into your life by accident. Everyone that crosses your path serves a purpose — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Love is a complicated peice of machinery. Sometimes all you need is a good hammershot to fix it. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Dear ugly people, if you ever feel that you hate your life, don't worry, you are not alone. I hate your life… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
People get so defensive and immediately start denying it if you dare accuse them of snoring. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I think the stomach is the most intelligent part of the body,Its smart enough to send the burps to the mouth and… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I do not take selfies. I photo bomb my phone while it's taking pictures of itself in the mirror. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A little ego is good. It prevents you from making a complete fool of yourself. But a little more ego has the… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Getting a blowjob with a condom on is like leaving your underwear on while taking a shit! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
My wife and I had words the other night. . . . . . . . . . Well, I had words; She had paragraphs. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
With all the bullshit in my life lately, I'm surprised I can't fertilize a nice flower garden in my back yard! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with me because she can't afford batteries — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I wonder if you have unprotected phone sex if you can get hearing aids? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Women fake headaches to get out of having sex with their man, and men fake not being married to have sex with a woman. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Scientists have found that women share the same dna as prawns.. Their heads are full of shit but their pink bits taste amazing! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When someone is mad and asks you Do I look stupid? Don't answer them just stare curiously at them — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Passion is a strong emotional desire of love and hate to humans or objects — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You may love a girl very deeply... But u CANNOT express it more deeper than... 5, 6 or 7 inches... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Note To Females: You cant blame the entire male genre just because you were attracted to some assholes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you can't understand what someone has said even though they have repeated it four times — Green Monk Copy Share Image
