If someone steps on your foot & asks Did I hurt you? . . Step on theirs (HARDER) & ask, Can you feel my answer? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I always try not to judge people. Which is probably why I lost my job as a judge — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Sometimes you have to talk quieter , To see who's really listening .. ¥ — Green Monk Copy Share Image
They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a shitload of beer and tacos and that's close enough. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Of course I look both ways when crossing a one way street. You never know what kind of idiot is behind the… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
There are 2 reasons I haven't killed you. I don't know what to do with the body and I'm the most likely… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Why would you let me know before unfollowing me? You're making it easier for me to track you down and murder you. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You know whats better than watching a beautiful woman get dressed...laughing at what she is wearing — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The biggest mistake to most people Listen to half of the conversation Understand the quarter Speak all the time.. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Was trying to count sheep to help me sleep but I don't think I'll be able to sleep anymore after being chased… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
'what do I do when I see someone gorgeous ? I stare, I smile, & when I get tired, I just put… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Pay attention, I'm only going to show you this once! ~ suicide bomber teacher. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Some, given the scepter of responsibility, confuse it with the club of authority. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
If cough medicine isn't meant to be abused, it should come with a table spoon, not a glass for taking shots. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I must have been really pissed when I drove home last night. We don't own a tractor. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Be Careful With What You Say To A G!rl. One Rude Comment That You Think Is No Big Deal Can Ruin Her… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I wonder if you have unprotected phone sex if you can get hearing aids? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Women fake headaches to get out of having sex with their man, and men fake not being married to have sex with a woman. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Scientists have found that women share the same dna as prawns.. Their heads are full of shit but their pink bits taste amazing! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When someone is mad and asks you Do I look stupid? Don't answer them just stare curiously at them — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Passion is a strong emotional desire of love and hate to humans or objects — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You may love a girl very deeply... But u CANNOT express it more deeper than... 5, 6 or 7 inches... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Note To Females: You cant blame the entire male genre just because you were attracted to some assholes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you can't understand what someone has said even though they have repeated it four times — Green Monk Copy Share Image
