WIFE, A woman who, in the same breath, can complain she has nothing to wear, and is bemoaning she needs more closet… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A woman goes to a palm reader and hears that her husband will die a violent death. She asks, Will I be… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, then we can be good friends. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you kan tpye reel Gode. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
''SYMPATHY''... You can get from Anybody -- But...!! ''JEALOUSY''... You have to Earn it…!!!!!!! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
There are caregivers and there are caretakers, and yet the two words are not opposites. Why is this? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I miss you when I'm not with you. When I'm not with you all I do is think about you. When I… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
On his daughter's diaper: There was so much poop. It didn't look like a baby's poop. It looked like a 55-year-old alcoholic… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The NFL is boring, the NBA is disintegrating, baseball is totally predictable. Maybe we do need the XFL. Maybe we need Nude… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
CORPORATE You have two cows. You sell one, force the other to produce the milk of four cows, then act surprised when… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that Ex-lovers Are really dying for you to telephone them at four… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
BUREAUCRACY You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm still in my first marriage. I know, it's wrong to talk about it so temporary like that. My current husband hates… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't wanna discuss about it - People who want to discuss about it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
