Comedy Quotes · Page 87

"You're an old man who dresses like a Hooter's waitress."

— Greg Giraldo

Comedy is the ultimate truth. Jazz is hitting the notes that that no one else would hit, and comedy is saying words…

— Tommy Chong

I did what any good full-time working mother would do and left my screaming toddler with my husband for three weeks and…

— Desi Lydic

You are a manipulator. I like to think of myself more as an outcome engineer.

— J.R. Ward

It is the success of 'Hera Pheri' that made me do more comedy films like 'Hungama,' 'Malamaal Weekly' and 'Bhool Bhulaiyaa.'

— Priyadarshan

Nobody wants to see sketch comedy that's the same sketch they've seen time and time again, or that's just a rehash of…

— Jordan Peele

I just wanted to perform. I just wanted to perform in whatever capacity, whether it was acting, singing, dancing, comedy - whatever…

— James Corden

I am keen on doing a comedy in a full-fledged positive role.

— Sudha Chandran

I know that if any other comedian came up to me questioning something I did or said, it would be literally settled…

— Carlos Mencia

I'd never been the class clown and comedy was not a fulfilment of a dream.

— Sean Lock

I think we must be very careful not to make our daughters despise men. For example, there is too much comedy around…

— Maureen Lipman

“The second rule of improvisation is not only to say yes, but YES, AND. You are supposed to agree and then _add…

— Tina Fey

I blame Hollywood for skewing perspectives. Life is just a big romantic comedy to them, and if you meet cute, happily ever-after…

— Jonathan Tropper

I'm starting to play lots more naturalistic, realistic people than when I first started. Maybe because I was doing character comedy shows,…

— Lolly Adefope

It's a very tough time for the playwright. Broadway has become almost a musical comedy theme park with all these long-running shows.

— John Lithgow

My parents are very practical people and they told me, 'If this comedy thing is an actual career and a job that…

— Ayo Edebiri

I've always loved the idea of the rookie cop vs. the grizzled veteran. A lot of comedy can be mined from that.

— Jermaine Fowler

I will always love to perform standup comedy.

— Shelley Berman

I try not to blame the public, because the public - men, especially - have seen not great portrayals of women in…

— Paul Feig

I wanted to be on Broadway, but in musical comedy.

— Carol Burnett

I love comedy; so you want to make them happy, make them laugh.

— Delta Burke

There's a certain truism that you can't be self-conscious in comedy. If I'm in it and if there's a scene that has…

— Ari Graynor

“Staring at my smoldering hot date, her husband stands tall for the first time in a decade, adjusting his toupee while flashing…

— Brett Tate

When I was studying comedy in Chicago, it wasn't long after 9/11. There were a lot Middle Eastern comedians who were doing…

— Kumail Nanjiani

As an ex-stand up, I can tell you that a comedy club isn't a place you go looking to get the abuse…

— John Ridley

Some people think it is difficult to be a Christian and to laugh, but I think it's the other way around. God…

— Garrison Keillor

I've had my own comedy series on telly and I know the truth about politics.

— Harry Enfield

“St John had always been a fan of the RS Turbo, mainly due to the colour coded rear spoiler and air vents…

— St. John Morris

I've never tried fatback. Probably 'cause it's called fatback. I don't know which word creeps me out more: fat or back. Why…

— Jim Gaffigan

The world of men show like a comedy without laughter: populations, interests, government, history; 't is all toy figures in a toyhouse.

— Ralph Waldo Emerson

I always tell people I went to the Harvard School of Comedy in front of America.

— Vicki Lawrence

Before comedy, I worked at a tech company, and before that, I worked on Wall Street. And, honestly, I've never really been…

— Michelle Wolf

Comedy is very difficult. You've got to have a perfect sense of timing.

— Suniel Shetty

If you wagered $5,000 on each of my winning NFL picks in 2012 and $500 ($550) on each of my losing picks, you'd be ahead $70,050. Wow.

— Norman Chad

When you're coming up with your philosophy and approach to performing comedy, you take special note of the things you disagree with…

— Andy Daly

Female hysteria is a subject I'm very fond of. I always try to bring it in somewhere. For me, it is the…

— Rachel Cusk

Often when you are starting out in comedy, you will find that people will laugh at the things you didn't think were…

— Natasha Leggero

Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling…

— Bernie Mac

The truth is, I should have never done teaching. I did teaching because I didn't have the bottle to have a go…

— Greg Davies

[ Hosting Saturday Night Live ] paved the way for Parks And Rec and The Grinder, the Comedy Central Roast, and that…

— Rob Lowe