Sean Lock

people say churches are half empty, they're not, they're too big

— Sean Lock

In my mind if you're over 25 and using Twitter you need to have a word with yourself.

— Sean Lock

I am naturally cautious so I guess I am a saver. I'm a firm believer in not borrowing money, which is a…

— Sean Lock

90% of toys are made in china, which technically makes the chinese elves

— Sean Lock

Being the headliner is only more pressure if you're not very good.

— Sean Lock

I now believe in God for my own ends. I'm not an altruistic Christian - I'm only doing it in case there…

— Sean Lock

I'm actually a miserable, authoritarian guy at home... no really, I'm strict.

— Sean Lock

Ron Mueck's 'Dead Dad' was fantastic. It was an almost exact replica of his dead dad's body, shrunk to be a third…

— Sean Lock

On '8 Out Of 10 Cats,' myself, Jimmy Carr and Jason Manford have got the producers around to our way of thinking…

— Sean Lock

If you like Harry Hill, you'd really like Tony Law. He's a Canadian comic who's done a few appearances on 'Never Mind…

— Sean Lock

I've got genuine political reasons for not voting for David Cameron. He's got a tiny little mouth.

— Sean Lock

Touring can be quite a dull life.

— Sean Lock

Interesting fact: a shark will only attack you if you’re wet.

— Sean Lock

I did once have a MySpace site but it was like a badly tended grave.

— Sean Lock

The hardest thing to write is sitcom.

— Sean Lock

Real men don't listen. I think you can waste a lot of valuable time listening to what people are saying to you…

— Sean Lock

Here's a message to all the employers out there reading this: if a comedian comes to you having given up comedy and…

— Sean Lock

I hate moaning comics, but I do find it very frustrating when I switch on BBC Four or BBC Two to find…

— Sean Lock

A real man doesn't know what cellulite is. Until I was 30 I thought cellulite was a building material used for restoring…

— Sean Lock

I go to my office nearly every day, and I'll sit there for six or seven hours and come up with ideas,…

— Sean Lock

I think people like to have something to have a moan about.

— Sean Lock

That's the thing about comedy, there's something utterly delightful and slightly pure about a really good joke, and to create one is…

— Sean Lock

In those stupid online polls to find the best sitcom ever, 'Father Ted' never gets the credit it deserves.

— Sean Lock

It's hard to pinpoint highlights on tour because they're the gigs really. The whole day becomes about the show. From the time…

— Sean Lock

I never moisturised until I got skin cancer. It totally changed my opinion on moisturising. I used to think using a face…

— Sean Lock