Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they'd lock us up?" All the time. — Wendy Mass Copy Share Image
I'm not so much interested in the return ON my money as I am in the return OF my money. — Will Rogers Copy Share Image
All those tears I cried over you were enough to make a pool, I hope you damn drown in that pool — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Not only does he have the NFC East record for touchdowns, but also the team record. — Emmitt Smith Copy Share Image
The authority of the civil defense ... issued a warning to the civilian population not to pick up any of those pencils… — Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf Copy Share Image
Four years ago on this very day I tried to take my own life. And I said, "Zach, do it in front… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
“I cast a look at where Rhys still remained sprawled on the cushions, watching us with raised brows. 'For someone who was… — Sarah J. Maas Copy Share Image
I tried eating vegetarian. I felt like a wimp going into a restaurant. "What do you want to eat sir? Broccoli?" Broccoli's… — Denis Leary Copy Share Image
Wasn't it thrilling when the U.S. Women's team took home the gold in gymnastics? A group of American teenagers getting a higher… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
We never really tried to shock for shock's sake on 'Family Guy'. If something was horribly offensive and shocking, we would put… — Seth MacFarlane Copy Share Image
The question Who ought to be boss? is like as Who ought to be the tenor in the quartet? Obviously, the man… — Henry Ford Copy Share Image
“If you start Forrest Gump at exactly 10:38:57 PM on New Years Eve, you can ring in the new year with Lieutenant Dan.” — stained hanes Copy Share Image
If you have never read the Protocols, you know nothing about the Jewish question. — Henry Hamilton Beamish Copy Share Image
“I ought to be jealous of the tower. She is more famous than I am.” — Gustave Eiffel Copy Share Image
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I know my spirit is not mean, and I have a very good spirit and a funny spirit. — Tracy Morgan Copy Share Image
The annoying moment when the TV commercials are so long that you forget what you're watching. — Ewshy Copy Share Image
We must have had 99 per cent of the match. It was the other three per cent that cost us. — Ruud Gullit Copy Share Image
A bee will knowingly risk its own life just to cause you a little pain. I can totally relate to that feeling. — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
My work is about seeing - seeing things like they haven't been seen before. — Robert Mapplethorpe Copy Share Image
If the early bird catches the worm, then what the night owl catches? — Vikrant Parsai Copy Share Image
When I step on the mat I know there is no other place I'd rather be. — Marcelo Garcia Copy Share Image
The only reason Woodstock was necessary is because they didn't have iTunes. — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
Just be wrong. Just stand there in your wrongness and be wrong, and get used to it. — Josiah Bartlett Copy Share Image
It's the beauty within us that makes it possible for us to recognize the beauty around us. — Joan D. Chittister Copy Share Image
Stewart has two cars in the top five: Magnusson 5th and Barichello 6th. — Murray Walker Copy Share Image
Thinking you stepped into Antarctica when actually, you've only stepped outta the shower. :c — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Even though your funny,crazy,guffy,weird and talkative… am that way too I love my freaky friends — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Whenever you feel worthless, Remember; You were once the quickest sperm cell.. :D — Anonymous Copy Share Image
