Not a Harvard-type education, just a not-sticking-up-a-liquor-store-type education. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Instead of saying LOL I am going to say SALTS(smiled a little then stopped).It's more truthful. — Shubham Joshi Copy Share Image
Please make sure photos of me from Cinco de Mayo are kept as concealed as photos of Bin Laden's death. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People are funny. They often don't mean to be, and that's what makes it even more endearing. — Jennifer Lee Copy Share Image
I can't wait for my boss to leave for the day so I can stop pretending to work. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
To make a discovery is not necessarily the same as to understand a discovery. — Abraham Pais Copy Share Image
Those Penis enlargement pills you have been taking must be working. You are a bigger Dick today than you were last week. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Phi cang Saigon Tansonnhut" "He puzzled at the meaning and smiled inwardly. The sign probably said, “Welcome and Affectionate Salutations to All… — Tony Taylor Copy Share Image
A male inmate promised a female prison guard, If you help me escape, I'll marry you. This is an example of using… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A lot of the things I say I'm just trying to be funny... I don't really mean everything I say, because I'm… — Paris Hilton Copy Share Image
“Most sane human beings who have managed to attain and retain fame each uses it to dramatically increase their name’s chances of… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“He twisted at the waist and stretched out on his side. “You’re a bit crazy. You throw apples in people’s faces when… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
A couple of days working with Joe Jonas, I thought, 'This guy is a slayer of a singer; he's really funny, goofy,… — Justin Tranter Copy Share Image
I don't watch too much television because I want to write something, and you never want to be influenced by other things… — Jim Norton Copy Share Image
