I really do have rules for running and managing a business that have never been formalized before. — Martha Stewart Copy Share Image
Greenspan, who knew so much more than most, knew far less than most supposed ... — Alan Greenspan Copy Share Image
Cavities are made by sugar. So if you need to dig a hole, then lay down some candy bars! — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
May you someday have the same right as straight men to subject a spouse to humiliating sex scandals. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You know you're a success when people tell you, “I like me best when I'm with you.” — Denis Waitley Copy Share Image
We as consumers really do have the right to know what's in our food, — Gary Hirshberg Copy Share Image
I know it's going to be just magical, and almost certainly going to be over quickly - on playing Sharapova. — Casey Dellacqua Copy Share Image
“Lilli . . . Lilli . . . Lilli.” Sweet Jesus, she was going to kill him. She’d just gotten to sleep.… — Susan Fanetti Copy Share Image
The big difference in those days was that in England the Government subsidized TV, in America we work on TV so we… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I've always been intrigued with the variety of answers this generation will give their children who ask, "Where did I come from,… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
My sister wanted to be an actress. She never made it, but she does live in a trailer... so she got halfway.… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
There was an austerely dignified award ceremony. By that I mean we had to buy our own drinks - in clear violation… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but usually manages to pick himself up, walk over or around it, and carry on. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm always trying to find the next comedian that just gives me something a little funny to combine with all of the… — Jesse Williams Copy Share Image
I'd love to do a film with Mariah. But it would have to be a comedy. She's the funniest woman in the… — Nick Cannon Copy Share Image
