“...space flight still had a long way to go to catch up with the safety record of the milkshake industry.” — Kevin Fong Copy Share Image
I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
If it takes you more than an hour to get ready,… you probably aren't as cute as you think you are — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I feel the tears slowly rolling down my eyes and suddenly the tears wont stop. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I don't really tell a joke, I react to situations. The whole thing is just looking at somebody and showing all our… — Don Rickles Copy Share Image
“I don’t want to talk about it,” she said. Once again he was close. Too close. So damn close. “At all,” she… — Jill Shalvis Copy Share Image
Wondering why logging onto Face book has become part of the everyday routine?… Do I really have nothing better to do! — Serenity Karma Copy Share Image
When you're are playing for the national championship, it's not a matter of life or death. Its more important than that. — Duffy Daugherty Copy Share Image
“I had a dream about you. In my dream I stole all your money, kidnapped your parents, and mailed you mannequin parts… — Dark Jar Tin Zoo Copy Share Image
“The world is full of unrequited love,' I said finally. 'You and Patrick having problems?' Dad said, reaching around to get the… — Phyllis Reynolds Naylor Copy Share Image
When your significant other asks if she looks fat in an outfit...simply smile grab a random dress and say "Not as fat… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, The ceremony which provides a man with something that, sooner or later, he will find he can't blame on the government; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
