It takes 65 muscles to frown and 13 to make a smile. Why work overtime? — B. J. Palmer Copy Share Image
I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
I hope months of starvation, obsessive exercise, and painful grooming will get boys to notice the inner me. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The national anthem blows. Are you kidding me? Do any of you have it on your iPod? — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
We don't sing about eating local produce or growing beards or anything like that. It's funny to find yourself in a position… — Ted Dwane Copy Share Image
I've always wanted to work with Elizabeth Banks. She's so talented and funny, and she's become this force of nature - directing,… — Gillian Jacobs Copy Share Image
“He gives me one of his most awful smiles. 'I suppose she'll have to be searched.' ... 'My husband was murdered,' I… — Holly Black Copy Share Image
Stop saying that humorous and funny people are the happiest people you've ever seen. There something behind that huge smile, loud cackle,… — Bernajoy Vaal Copy Share Image
The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he's not… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
“And then we heard a branch break. It might have been a deer, but the Colonel busted out anyway. A voice directly… — John Green Copy Share Image
With drama, you know if you're having a true moment, but in comedy, if somebody doesn't laugh, then you know you're not… — Brooke Nevin Copy Share Image
“That awkward moment when you realize someone was actually home the whole time you were singing on the tops of your lungs.” — Kasey Collin P. Dumdum Copy Share Image
