Humor Quote by Irelynd Brown Download Open image ““I'm so busy I dont know whether to scratch my watch or wind my butt”” — Irelynd Brown ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 3.7 out of 5 (6 ratings) Copy quoteShare Humor
“Do not scratch when itched, nor shift when cramped, nor pause when tired.” — Jack Kornfield Copy Share Image
“My watch has two hands. So do I. I’d better watch my watch to see if it also masturbates.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Do you realize i havent even begun to scratch the surface of the things i want to do to you?” — Meredith Wild Copy Share Image
“who says we can’t touch ourselves to keep from getting bored? nothing else is touching thats for sure ” — The Dresden Dolls Copy Share Image
“If you gotta scratch the itch, scratch it. Or, if you want to do away with the day job, scratch, itch or no!” — Deb E. Howell Copy Share Image
“The night before a deadline, I usually am in desperate need of a back rub. And new wrists. And candy. And little mice to… — Christy Hall Copy Share Image
“Damn you, you made up lame excuses and practically patted me on the head. And tonight, you've got an itch and you're annoyed that… — Nora Roberts Copy Share Image
“I don’t know, if they want to watch me scratch my butt or eat dinner, I feel like that says more about them than… — Veronica Roth Copy Share Image
“Sometimes I think life's nothin' but sittin' around watchin' pretty go bad.” — Jerry Stahl Copy Share Image
'Mad TV' is one of my most favorite shows of all time and is a huge part of my obsession with sketch comedy. — Shane Dawson Copy Share Image
When you step out and do a song in a musical, the easier thing to do is make it funny. But when those transitions… — Kelli O'Hara Copy Share Image
In my opinion, sexiness comes down to three things: chemistry, sense of humor, and treatment of waitstaff at restaurants. — Rhoda Janzen Copy Share Image
“...I haven't guessed where your shirt is from yet Bane, but I don't think it'll matter once it's underwater!' Tristan looked at Bane questioningly. Bane rolled his eyes and stage whispered: 'She asked why I cared so much about getting her dirty, teary face all my new shirt earlier, and asked where I got it from anyway. I said: 'Guess',… — S.K. Munt Copy Share
“Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you'll die of a misprint.” — Markus Herz Copy Share Image
“Not wise, perhaps, to be rude to the Pope's favorite son, but my viper tongue still required a fool now and then on which… — Kate Quinn Copy Share Image
In the future, I would like to do more films with contemporary themes. Perhaps comedy, which is something I have done in theater but… — Luke Evans Copy Share Image
“[S]ometimes, when you are a food person, the possible irrelevance of what you are doing doesn’t cross your mind until it’s too late. (Once, for example, when I was just starting out in the food business, I was hired by the caper people to develop a lot of recipes using capers, and it was weeks of tossing capers into just… — Nora Ephron Copy Share
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently? — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
“ “Do Southerners laugh at different things than Northerners do? Yes, I say--Northerners.” Roy Blount, Jr., Roy Blount’s Book of Southern Humor” — Deborah Ford Copy Share
