Humor Quote by Ernest Cline

“Goddammit!” he shouted. “Well, what am I supposed to do with it now?” “You could shove it up your ass and pretend you’re a…

— Ernest Cline

“Just tell me you're mine, I'm yours, and you won't kiss, fuck or otherwise let any other man batter dip his corn dog with…

— C.M. Stunich

“people today find real debate about actual topics difficult, and much prefer the parody of debate which consists of giving a dog a bad…

— N.T. Wright

“No one likes to shove a puppy away, but when it starts humping your leg, you have to.”

— J.S. Scott

“I'll be your puppy. What do you want me to do? Chew your slippers? Piss on the kitchen floor? Lick your nose? Sniff your…

— Neil Gaiman

“I'm going to put corn and hot sauce on your wiener, and then I'll hit you in the face with it. Hit you in…

— Tara Sivec

And Max, I've put some scraps in a bowl for your dog," Mom said. "It's on the floor, by the back door." The flock…

— James Patterson

“Would you believe I was in the neighborhood?” “No." “Well, how about that I needed to see you.” “Why? Did one of my neighbors…

— Leslie Parrish

“We could, you know, go out for hot dogs. Don’t worry—they’re not actually dogs. It’s just a name. They’re these meat things that you…

— Richelle Mead

Wanna hear a joke about corn?! nevermind it's corny.

— Jordan Trienta Dos Thomas

Anonymous blog comments, vapid video pranks and lightweight mash-ups may seem trivial and harmless, but as a whole, this widespread practice of fragmentary, impersonal…

— Jaron Lanier

“Talking of being eaten by dogs, there’s a dachshund at Brinkley who when you first meet him will give you the impression that he…

— P.G. Wodehouse