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Want Quotes by Dave Barry
- Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.
- People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
- I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.
- You can, legally, possibly hit and kill a fellow golfer with a ball, and there will not be a lot of trouble because the other…
- Today's toys contain computer chips, so they can move and talk; this stimulates the mind of your child. Notice I say "your child." MY child…
- Professional marriage counselors agree that the most productive and mature way to deal with marital anger is to stomp dramatically from the room. You want…
- What women want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be trusted, and sometimes, just…
- Of course, the truth is that the congresspersons are too busy raising campaign money to read the laws they pass. The laws are written by…
- The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a…
- If you want to give a man something practical, consider tires. More than once, I would have gladly traded all the gifts I got for…
- Fortunately the boat we rented had a motor in it You will definitely want this feature on your sailboat too, because if you put up…
- Baby's room should be close enough to your room so that you can hear baby cry, unless you want to get some sleep, in which…
- The Democrats believe that if God did not want them to raise taxes, He would not have created the Internal Revenue Service.
- I'm afraid that, in this chapter we must talk about sex in a very explicit manner, because we want to expand the Frontiers of Human…
- What I like best about the telephone is that it keeps you in touch with people, particularly people who want to sell you magazine subscriptions…
- To people who make moving ads that block the view of websites: Not only will we not buy from you, but we want shrews to…
- Let's talk about how to fill out your 1984 tax return. Here's an often overlooked accounting technique that can save you thousands of dollars: For…
- We're deep into the holiday gift-giving season, as you can tell from the fact that everywhere you look, you see jolly old St. Nick urging…
- The IRS wants you to use this form because it gets to keep most of your money. So unless you have pond silt for brains,…
- The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery. They're the…
- 2. The instant the doors open, you want to push forward as hard as possible, in an effort to get onto the train without letting…
- She wanted to cry, but she did not want Peter to see her cry, and she especially did not want Teacher, with her flowing hair,…
- My son, Rob....said the only time he ever wraps a gift is, quote, "if it's such a poor gift that I don't want to be…
More Want Quotes
- If you want to annoy your neighbors, tell the truth about them. — Pietro Aretino
- Flattery and deceit are the darlings of great men, and so with these men spread the butter on thick, if you want… — Pietro Aretino
- I want to do what I want when I want to do it not be dictated to by audiences. — Dario Argento
- Whenever a toddler sees a pile of blocks, he wants to tear it down. — J. J. Abrams
- I know how the American people care for that democratic principle. They want to see their vote respected. As we in Haiti… — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- Sometimes people who want to understand Haiti from a political perspective may be missing part of the picture. They also need to… — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- I try to work on shows that I would want to watch. — J. J. Abrams
- It's our hearts and brains that we should exercise more often. You can put on all the makeup you want, but it… — Kevyn Aucoin
- Our efforts are not aimed at isolating Israel or de-legitimizing it; rather we want to gain legitimacy for the cause of the… — Mahmoud Abbas
- We want the Israelis to leave. They want to leave - so let us let them leave. — Mahmoud Abbas
- The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work. — Richard Bach
- I don't want to do business with those who don't make a profit, because they can't give the best service. — Richard Bach