Sarcastic Quotes

891 Sarcastic quotes by 449 unique authors

Just lil' ole me in this BIG ole world... — Adrienne Rico
The more and more I'm around people the more and more I realize my sarcastic no patience having ass does not need to be working… — Nicole Hill
A police officer asked me where I was between 4 and 5? I said kindergarten. — Kayla Knight
I like when I ask a person to please have a seat and they point to the only other chair in the room and ask,… — Nicole Hill
You do realize that I'm a sarcastic being and half of my texts aren't really what they seem, right? Oh, no? Sweet. — Taissa Farmiga
I'm muti-talented. Why? Cuz' I can talk and piss you off at the same time. — Michiiko
Being a 2 sided bitch is hard isn't it? I don't know what side to slap first. — Michiiko
The human race is lucky I'm a nice girl, otherwise only 1/4 of them would be alive right now. — Airyell Speaks
Do not fear being sarcastic because at worst the smart ones will get annoyed and the dumb will take it as a compliment — Juju
When someone calls and says is this Jerett? I say, No! It's Jake from StateFarm! and then I hang up with authority... — Jerett Parker
Don't call me at 3am and ask me if I'm sleepin .. No I'm skydiving.. the fuck you think I'm doing? — Jerett Parker
In real life...you can't write 2 sentences on antyhing...but on Twitter you're a philosopher... — Jerett Parker
You don't like when I get jealous, so you must wanting me to stopping caring about us? — Kristy Truong
Bitch I'm Not Impressed , you must have got the Wrong Impression — Syoung
Oh I see you shine bright like a diamond huh? Well that's cool. I think I'll pass on my value and worth being determined or… — Nicole Hill
Give a great big hug to all the drug dealers, sluts, and ass holes. They sure know how keep the world going — Masha Mezz
You're so fake, Barbie's jealous — Avalon
Dear maths, Grow up and solve your own problems please — Avalon
My mom asked me how was I going to dress this halloween. I replied sarcastically ''Like a hoe''. She thought it was cute that I'm… — Avalon
I swear, if Facebook changes their layout one more time, I'm going to post a status update about it & then use their site as… — Hussein Nishah
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes. — Hussein Nishah
I'm sorry for loving you, I'm sorry that I cared, I'm sorry for holding onto you but our love was rare. I'm sorry for thinking… — Mahmoud El Hallab
Women are good for 70 things, sandwiches and 69. — Risa Schizophrenia
Everybody says sh*t happens, but don't you hate it when there is no toilet paper!!! — Ash Sweeney
I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Yes, I am looking in… — Ash Sweeney

Who Wrote These Sarcastic Quotes

449 authors contributed a total of 891 Sarcastic Quotes, led by these top contributors: