“His words were: hello, good-bye, yes, no, please, thank you, okay, sorry, and suck my dick. He” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Get in, get out, and nobody gets hurt, as Uncle Harlan always said, something he picked up in Vietnam.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“That was supposed to be the whole purpose of the Internet, you know. To share scientific information." "Not a Viagra- and porn-delivery… — Christopher Moore Humor Copy Share Image
“[Conservation] Barring that, just yell at people randomly to stop killing whales. It could catch on. Really. ("Would you like fries with… — Christopher Moore Christopher-moore Copy Share Image
“People are douche bags. Many people. Not all. But you know, most. Which is why we destroyed the world.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Adeline had come to Christianity the same way she had come to sex and smoking:through peer pressure.Thinking about her six kids and… — Christopher Moore Christianity Copy Share Image
“They are between. Not what they used to be, and not what they have become. In those times, they are nothing. And… — Christopher Moore Friendship Copy Share Image
Stop," I said. "Please do not further endorken yourself to me. You have great hair and a car that is most fly,… — Christopher Moore Agendas Copy Share Image
And he was like "The sedative in the blood, blah, blah, four hours, blah, blah, nerdspeak, geektalk -" -Abby — Christopher Moore Abby Copy Share Image
You think you know how this story is going to end, but you don't. — Christopher Moore Ends Copy Share Image
“Out came an extraordinarily complex network of plastic, brass, and stainless-steel tubing, which in seconds Kona had assembled into what Quinn thought… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Does the work get easier once you know what you are doing?" "Your lungs grow thick with stone dust and your eyes… — Christopher Moore Every night Copy Share Image
“When it appeared that even the most passive-aggressive attempts would not work, Charlie resorted to the ultimate Beta Male Attack, which was… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Rivera rubbed his temples. "Satan told you to do it?" he said wearily. "No." "Elvis?" "I told you, it's supernatural.” — Christopher Moore Comedy-humor Copy Share Image
“WARNING This is a bawdy tale. Herein you will find gratuitous shagging, murder, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity… — Christopher Moore Fools Copy Share Image
“Charlie found himself affecting the Emperor's formal speech patterns, as if somehow he had been transported to a royal court where a… — Christopher Moore Communication Copy Share Image
“Cuando no tienes buenos argumentos, a veces es mejor darle la vuelta a la tortilla y ponerte a preguntar tú. Lo aprendí… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
If you have come to these pages for laughter, may you find it. If you are here to be offended, may your… — Christopher Moore Adventure Copy Share Image
“By Aladdin's lamplit scrotum, man! Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth.” — Christopher Moore Humor Copy Share Image
