Beating Newt Gingrich in a popularity contest is like beating Stephen Hawking in 'Dancing with the Stars.' — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Why is Mitt Romney not bragging: 'I covered all these people'? Why can't the Democrats sell the idea, we're trying to make… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Democrats are lame. The media is lame. And Donald Trump hasn't even played his war card yet. You know, he could start… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
It somehow became an article of faith on the right that Obama is the most extreme president in American history. Although, when… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I do miss George Bush. Compared to these teabaggers and the people who are pandering to them, he looks like a professor. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Ronald Reagan came from show business. His idea of how the government should help the homeless was like your agent. "We'll try… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The politicians are no prizes, but the people are even worse, they're so ill-informed. I never understand the pushback when I say… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Hillary Clinton and Nancy Reagan have a lot in common - they're both smarter than their husbands and both consulted the stars… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Donald Trump got the power of the government behind him now. He didn't have that before when he was just a clown.… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: You can't put a windmill in your campaign ad if you voted against every single bill that might lead to… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I don't think George Bush is a good president by any imagination, but when he said, 'If you're talking to Al-Quaeda, we… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
It's very well known that the Republicans have problems with minorities. The Democrats have big problems with white people. Obama only got… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New Rule: This Valentine’s Day Americans must remember that politicians are like a box of chocolates. We bite into them to find… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
It's nine months before the election and Bush's poll numbers have fallen to the exact level that his father's poll numbers were… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The Democrats are very bad at selling their own product. The Republicans are geniuses at it. And I've said it before, a… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
McCain was introduced at the convention last night by his wife -- I won't say 'trophy wife' -- but she did $300,000… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
What kind of tyrant punishes everyone just to get back at the few he's mad at? I mean, besides Chris Christie. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Obama is huge in the polls these days. His popularity is soaring. Even conservatives are coming around. 30 percent of them now… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The shame would be if Democrats get thrown out of office without ever having tried Democratic policies. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
[George W. Bush] has balls. And he's a leader. Unfortunately his balls and leadership are in the service of shitty ideas. We… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
During the debate, Bush was asked by a lady to name three mistakes he's made. And Bush responded, this debate, the last… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
In Republican fantasy world, everything is always Obama's fault. Somehow, he's weak and he's ineffective, and yet he pulls the strings on… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
You can always tell when Obama's negotiations with the Republicans are winding down, because he's missing his watch and his lunch money. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
You talk about 'Obama is going to herd us into FEMA brainwashing camps.' Maybe your brain needs a little washing. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Hey birthers, wanna hear my theory? My theory was that Obama was born in America and you were born with the umbilical… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I couldn't run for any office. I think that religion is bad, weed is good, and babies are disgusting; who would vote… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New polls show that Obama is now pulling away from Mitt Romney. And, of course, what could be more natural than to… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
How can the Republicans get away with picking their Dennis Kucinich, but when - if the Democrats tried it, all hell would… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I was out at the HBO party, these are liberals, I imagine, and a lot of people came up to me and… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
In this country, a smart leader is suspect. That's just the way it is. Even George Bush's father, who was a lot… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
What we don't know is about Jeb Bush and cocaine. But we do know that he did once had his brother Florida… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
President Obama invited John McCain to the White House to give his opinion on Egypt, specifically what it's like to be a… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
There are only three ways a congressman goes out: They die in office, they cash in as a lobbyist, or they mistakenly… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
No politician is perfect. But in every election in your life, there will be one choice that is better than the others.… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The Republican Party is like the corpse in 'Weekend at Bernies' and the Tea Party is like the two guys who put… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Don't vote for Republicans or Democrats until they clean up the open system of bribery that we live under. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Why did Mitt Romney strap his dog to the roof of his car? Could it be because his station wagon was full… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
It's going to be Perry, it's going to be Romney...It's sort of a battle for the soul of the Republican Party -… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
George Bush says, 'Gore's book needs a lot of explaining.' Of course, Bush says that about every book. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
London. Another terrorist attack and ISIS claimed credit. I am surprised because I thought we had wiped out ISIS on day one… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
A lot of people say they are dyslexic; some have to realize that they are just stupid. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I saw this anti-drug commercial that showed a kid smoking pot in his dad's room with his friend. This kid finds a gun, the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
To all conservative women out there: If you are so sure the embryo needed for stem cell research are precious human life that can't… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
You see, the difference is the Republicans' hatred of Obama is based on a paranoid feeling about what he might do, what he's thinking,… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New Rule: There is no devil, so stop blaming your screw-ups on him. Last week, one of the biggest evangelical leaders in America, the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
If we were a dog and God owned us, the cops would come and take us away. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: The White House doesn't have to release the dead Bin Laden photos, but don't pretend we can't take it. We've seen pictures… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I don't hate America. I love America. I want it to be better. The only way we can get it to be better is… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: Americans must realize what makes NFL football so great: socialism. That's right, the NFL takes money from the rich teams and gives… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
So many kids are fat drug addicts these days, it's almost as if Rush Limbaugh had puppies. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
What we don't know is about Jeb Bush and cocaine. But we do know that he did once had his brother Florida on a… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“I find that the world is changing much, much faster than I can even bitch about it.” — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
![“[George W. Bush] has balls. And he's a leader. Unfortunately his balls and leadership are in the service of shitty ideas. We need his balls on someone who thinks right.” quote by Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/7cb/bill-maher-211_balls_george-w-bush-has-balls-and-he-s-a-leade_3212482.jpg)
