The best-laid plans of mice and comedians usually wind up on the cutting-room floor. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
It upset me that, five days after the hurricane hit down in New Orleans, the President's plan was for a day of… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Analysis of President Bush's tax plan has revealed that several elaborate tricks and gimmicks were used to make it look like a… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Michael Brown, the director of FEMA, was nominated by President Bush in 2003 and plans to start the job any day now.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The Republicans are calling the Democrats' plan to have a deadline for US troop withdrawal from Iraq an 'admission of failure', as… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Fox opposes a Syria peace plan because its modus operandi is to foment dissent in the form of a relentless and irrational… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
President Bush announced his new economic plan. The centerpiece was a proposed repeal of the dividend tax on stocks, a boon that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't know how people feel,that's the beauty of TV, is they can see us, but we can't see them. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it's not even… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You know, in Saudi Arabia, you're innocent until proven Jewish. Female. Guilty! They're guilty! — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Do you guys have to sell everything? I'd like to buy the Earth's core. — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of 's.'… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
