Giving Quotes by Jon Stewart

I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is institutionalizing the advantages that wealth gives you.

— Jon Stewart

People, if you can't get through the puns, I can't give you the good stuff.

— Jon Stewart

At the end of your life, do you give a concession speech?

— Jon Stewart

Everything in Italian sounds like 'Give me your money or I'm going to beat your @$$'.

— Jon Stewart

Give me back the $800 billion for the Iraq war and children's television PBS is on the house.

— Jon Stewart

We could overcome the baser aspects of our nature... and give this planet the kind of caretakers it deserves.

— Jon Stewart

And try as I might, I am having difficulty giving a f**k.

— Jon Stewart

The Department of Homeland Security recommends a three-day supply of water consisting of one bottle per day for each person in your…

— Jon Stewart

I can't sing. Never been able to sing. I can't do voices very well. Every impression I do sounds the same. I…

— Jon Stewart

If you're going to give people 20 minutes of news satire, you've also got to give them Tiffani-Amber Thiessen or you're going…

— Jon Stewart

Who cares how we avoided a war and got a dictator to give up his chemical weapons if we avoided a war…

— Jon Stewart

Although to be fair, cherry picking isn't quite what we do. Cherries are sweet and delicious. What we do is more turd…

— Jon Stewart

More than 150 heads of state attended the UN Summit, giving New Yorkers a chance to get in touch with prejudices they…

— Jon Stewart

Following revelations that he fathered a love child, the good Reverend Jesse Jackson - or should we say the 'very' good Reverend…

— Jon Stewart

When Henry Hill [in Goodfellas] got arrested for the first time and Robert DeNiro met him at the courthouse and Henry Hill…

— Jon Stewart

North Korea is making several demands in exchange for giving up their nuclear program, including a promise from America not to attack…

— Jon Stewart

Whenever you take over something that is popular and has a fanatical following that loves it, you're never going to please everyone.…

— Jon Stewart

I think that, if we do anything in a positive sense for the world, is provide one little bit of context, that's…

— Jon Stewart

That is the American experiment. An ethnic group arriving on America's shores, to be reviled and hazed, living in squalor, or if…

— Jon Stewart

Hopefully the process is to spot things that would be grist for the funny mill. In some respects, the heavier subjects are…

— Jon Stewart

This morning, prompted by increasing concerns about terrorism, oil prices reached a record high as the cost of a barrel of crude…

— Jon Stewart