When you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn't a lot worth paying attention… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
When you look at Earth from that one picture, the one from space, it's really a rather attractive thing. I have nothing… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Valentine's Day is devoted to love. Why don't we have a day devoted to hatred? The raw, visceral hatred that is felt… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
There are two types of people: One strives to control his environment, the other strives not to let his environment control him.… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I think we’re part of a greater wisdom that we will ever understand; a higher order, call it what you want. Know… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
The more complicated the order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a 'decaf grandee, half soy,… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Early in my career I was divided because I had the real self underneath: the lawbreaker, the anarchist, the person who swims… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
My books and records are arranged according to subject, and within each subject, they're alphabetical by author or artist. The music tapes… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I like to control my environment, because I feel if I have my physical space in order, then I'm free to dream.… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I set out to become a comedian, and I said in order to do that the first thing I'll do is become… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
It turned out I was pretty good in science. But again, because of the small budget, in science class we couldn't afford… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I never go anywhere or do anything that transports me outside the boundaries of my mind. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. ... These two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY. Not true. Today is another day. We have no idea what tomorrow is going to be. It might turn out… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I was a loner as a child. I had an imaginary friend - I didn't bother with him. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“If you guys want to get a MOM tattoo and save a little money, just get two letters done. Get about a one-inch capital… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday! — George Carlin Copy Share Image
It ended suddenly for Brenda, more slowly for me. My runs began getting shorter and less pleasurable. I'd feel bad after only one day,… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
The whole idea of the pursuit of goods and possessions has completely corrupted the human experience, along with religion, which I think limits the… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
