Just be happy that something traveled 5,000 miles across the Pacific and, for once, it wasn't your job. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
This is America. We don't call an election before we know who won. That, after all, is the job of the Supreme… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I believe only foreigners should run for president...Face it, the presidency is a lousy job. And who does lousy jobs we don't… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
We've created over 200,000 jobs every month this year. Hasn't happened in 17 years. I guess my first question is, when do… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New Rule: News organizations have to stop using the phrase: "We go beyond the headlines." That's your job, dummy. You don't see… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
God knows life sucks. It's right there in the Bible. The book of Job is all about Job asking God to take… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I want to always be an interloper. I never want to feel like I'm a guy who is embraced by the people… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Ted Cruz, of course, was furious that the big storm back east shut down the government. He said, 'That my job!' But… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
And he said that 47%-that's pretty high-47% of Americans are basically welfare bums who are mooching off the government. And then he… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
Herman Cain answered the Wall Street protesters, and he had a message for these protesters. He said, 'If you don't have a… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
When did the business community in America become so sensitive? ... that we have to treat like some type of rare exotic… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
The other financial genius, John McCain, said the fundamentals of our economy are strong, and then yesterday he wanted to fire the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
People do not want to be disillusioned by the new president [Barak Obama]. The liberals felt, finally, this is our time. Now… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
A lot of people say they are dyslexic; some have to realize that they are just stupid. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I saw this anti-drug commercial that showed a kid smoking pot in his dad`s room with his friend. This kid finds a gun, the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
To all conservative women out there: If you are so sure the embryo needed for stem cell research are precious human life that can't… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
You see, the difference is the Republicans' hatred of Obama is based on a paranoid feeling about what he might do, what he's thinking,… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
New Rule: There is no devil, so stop blaming your screw-ups on him. Last week, one of the biggest evangelical leaders in America, the… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
If we were a dog and God owned us, the cops would come and take us away. — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: The White House doesn't have to release the dead Bin Laden photos, but don't pretend we can't take it. We've seen pictures… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
I don't hate America. I love America. I want it to be better. The only way we can get it to be better is… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
“New Rule: Americans must realize what makes NFL football so great: socialism. That's right, the NFL takes money from the rich teams and gives… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
![“People do not want to be disillusioned by the new president [Barak Obama]. The liberals felt, finally, this is our time. Now they're worried. Now what they see is more business as usual. We all want to give him the benefit of the doubt, we know it's a tough job and he inherited a mess, but at the…” quote by Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/a55/bill-maher-211_barak-obama_people-do-not-want-to-be-disillusioned-b_2978248.jpg)
