“She suggested we 'crouch' buck nekkid on the bed or a dresser and leap out at him from the shadows. Now, my… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“If you buy an SUV, you're buying your safety at the expense of someone else's." ... If you're driving a Hyundai, which… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“ [Home Economics Textbook from 1950] : "Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you'll look refreshed when hubby comes home… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I think it would be funny to have one of those family decals showing a really skinny teenage girl barfing into a… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I feel guilty looking at those "People of Walmart" photos you see on the Internet. It's not cool to make fun of… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“This phrase did not have the ring of verisimilitude because I am famously bad at math. If I'm in charge of tipping… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“A friend confided to me recently that she wasn't sure if it was the 'change,' plain old PMS, or just a slow… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I'm fairly certain that, at this very minute, the [Mars Polar Lander] is floating somewhere around the Neptune feeling tired and cranky… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I braced myself for something wise and useful. Dink, like most Bubbas, could be quite insightful and kind when you least expected… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“My friends scoffed at my anxiety and said dumb things like, 'Fifty is the new forty!' Which just made me realize that… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“Sophie and I would use her Christmas break to make homemade treats from our very own kitchen. I mean, if thousands of… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“Jehovah's Witness are welcomed into my home...You gotta respect anybody who gets all dressed up in Sunday clothes and goes door-to-door on… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“Severe isn't a word normally associated with a cold. Severe is for weather or third-degree burns...No one responds 'severe' when someone asks… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“ [Home Economics Textbook from 1950] : "Make [your husband] comfortable. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“Carbohydrates from the Latin, carbo which means "yummy" and hydrates which means "cinnamon bun," are not something I can eliminate or even… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“This is the silliest thing I've heard since the cat yoga craze a couple of years ago. I went right out and… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“It would be easier if they named jeans for celebrities so you'd know exactly what you were getting without even having to… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“[Reverend James] Dobson says that the [Spongebob Squarepants] video would be watched by millions of elementary school students and includes a reference… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
Proper driving etiquette demands that you basically get close enough to a car in front of you at a busy intersection that… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“When I opened the last [401k] statement, I jumped out of the window. True, it was the kitchen window and I only… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I really loathe [the bumper sticker] 'Proud Parent of a Terrific Kid!' Why not a bumper sticker for the unlucky parents, something… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
To the newcomer to the south, hearing that a coworker plans a weekend visit to 'mama and them's' (the correct plural possessive, don'tchaknow), might… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
Pecans are not cheap, my hons. In fact, in the South, the street value of shelled pecans just before holiday baking season is roughly… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“She suggested we 'crouch' buck nekkid on the bed or a dresser and leap out at him from the shadows. Now, my husband can't… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“As far as I can tell, the biggest side effect of a gluten sensitivity is that you actually become the number one symptom: a… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“If you buy an SUV, you're buying your safety at the expense of someone else's." ... If you're driving a Hyundai, which basically runs… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“ [Home Economics Textbook from 1950] : "Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you'll look refreshed when hubby comes home from work.… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
I have several close friends who have run marathons, a word that is actually derived from two Swahili words: mara, which means 'to die… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
And I reminded myself that it's easy to be grateful for the obvious blessings in life, much harder to be grateful for the tough… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“Ever since they invented Hello Kitty, the world hasn't been the same. You can safely chart the rise of The Culture of Cute since… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I think it would be funny to have one of those family decals showing a really skinny teenage girl barfing into a little chalk-outline… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“I feel guilty looking at those "People of Walmart" photos you see on the Internet. It's not cool to make fun of pitiful people.… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
“This phrase did not have the ring of verisimilitude because I am famously bad at math. If I'm in charge of tipping at a… — Celia Rivenbark Copy Share Image
