Gluten Quote by Celia Rivenbark

To the newcomer to the south, hearing that a coworker plans a weekend visit to 'mama and them's' (the correct plural possessive, don'tchaknow), might…

— Celia Rivenbark

Pecans are not cheap, my hons. In fact, in the South, the street value of shelled pecans just before holiday baking season is roughly…

— Celia Rivenbark

“She suggested we 'crouch' buck nekkid on the bed or a dresser and leap out at him from the shadows. Now, my husband can't…

— Celia Rivenbark

“If you buy an SUV, you're buying your safety at the expense of someone else's." ... If you're driving a Hyundai, which basically runs…

— Celia Rivenbark

“ [Home Economics Textbook from 1950] : "Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you'll look refreshed when hubby comes home from work.…

— Celia Rivenbark

I have several close friends who have run marathons, a word that is actually derived from two Swahili words: mara, which means 'to die…

— Celia Rivenbark

And I reminded myself that it's easy to be grateful for the obvious blessings in life, much harder to be grateful for the tough…

— Celia Rivenbark

“Ever since they invented Hello Kitty, the world hasn't been the same. You can safely chart the rise of The Culture of Cute since…

— Celia Rivenbark

“I think it would be funny to have one of those family decals showing a really skinny teenage girl barfing into a little chalk-outline…

— Celia Rivenbark

“I feel guilty looking at those "People of Walmart" photos you see on the Internet. It's not cool to make fun of pitiful people.…

— Celia Rivenbark

“This phrase did not have the ring of verisimilitude because I am famously bad at math. If I'm in charge of tipping at a…

— Celia Rivenbark

Who can fail to mist at Fergie's anthem, 'My humps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps.' Hmmm. 'My lunch, my lunch, I swear it's…

— Celia Rivenbark