Years of education , solving tough problems, handling complex issues, yet we take a while standing before glass doors thinking whether to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dad, thanks for struggling with your homosexuality long enough to sire me. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
At school: if you take too long inthe bathroom, EVERYONE THINKS YOU POOPED. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Hitler might not have been such an asshole if he hadn't been left hanging for all his high fives. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Happiness is being retired and spending all of my kids' inheritance before I die! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Fun prank idea: Replace all of the songs on someone's iPod with the Kid Bop versions — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The son of a b!tch moment when you're walking around the house in socks and you step on awet spot. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My friends are getting married. I'm getting drunk. I think we know who the real winner is. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Lets face it, we all had our teachers ass in our face when they were helping another student — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Happy Mother's Day to a mom who didn't intentionally get knocked up to be on MTV. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Things to do today: (1) Dig a hole. (2) Name it love. (3) Watch people fall in love. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Never argue with an idiot. People watching won't be able to tell the difference — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Girls on Periods - I'm fine. I hate you. I love you. I want ice cream. Come here. Get away. You're cute.… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Congratulations on your new job that you probably won't like any better. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Hey, I don't know you, so this is crazy, but here's my profile, so subscribe to me maybe?Â¥ I won't accept friend… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I recently gave up Warcraft so my productivity, and drinking, have increased dramatically. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can figure out how bad a person you are by how soon after September 11th you masturbated, like how long you… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
He's turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he's miserable and depressed. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm glad Ashton Kutcher found a job where I know I can avoid seeing him. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
