A comedian is not funny unless he is taking his demons out for a walk. — Cynthia Heimel Copy Share Image
People only mention it's a free country if they're doing something shitty. — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
I've often been told that if music doesn't work out I could be a comedian. — Jade Bird Copy Share Image
I think Mitch Hedberg is one of the great comedians of the past 20 years. — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part. — Andy Borowitz Copy Share Image
You don't look down at your feet. A lot of comedians want to look down at their feet, but you break contact… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
My goal as a comedian is to sway people's opinion. It's not my only goal and it's not the only way I… — Adam Conover Copy Share Image
Donald Trump is not running for president. This is devastating news for Trump's supporters - all of whom are late night comedians. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist. — George Burns Copy Share Image
Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on. — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
Though part of me had always wanted to be a comedian, another part of me had always wanted to be Bryant Gumbel… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I don't think that comedians have a tradition of trashing the next generation. — Franklyn Ajaye Copy Share Image
I'm not very funny in real life. I used to want to be a comedian when I was 13, 14, 15, till… — Gene Wilder Copy Share Image
I've not really been angling to be a comedian. I knew comics and I loved them and I loved being funny, but… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
Hard audiences tend to be when it's all men. It's when businesses have dos where they're at conferences all day then book… — Michael McIntyre Copy Share Image
“Laurie:Uh-huh. Ahuhuhuh... Jeez, y'know, that felt good. There don't seem to be that many laughs around these days. Dan: Well, what do… — Alan Moore Copy Share Image
By watching the great, old comedians I picked up a few tricks about how to do physical comedy. And whenever I could… — John Cleese Copy Share Image
I'm perfectly happy to have the reputation as a comedian. I love comedies, I would love to be doing more comedies. But… — Elizabeth Banks Copy Share Image
I never thought I could be a comedian, because I never thought I was funny. A lot of other people thought I… — Deon Cole Copy Share Image
As a comedian, I started very apolitical. I definitely never talked about current events or matters of identity, or any of these… — Julio Torres Copy Share Image
This is going to sound pretentious, but I like comedy that addresses something I find either worrisome or interesting in my life.… — Zach Woods Copy Share Image
Comedians dissect jokes all the time. Comedians are beautiful structuralists. But ultimately it's an athletic endeavor. You have to be able to… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
A lot of times people will have after-parties or try and host an event for comedians, and they misunderstand us. They think… — Tig Notaro Copy Share Image
One of the problems I see with these comics on television, particularly cable television, is, since you can say anything in terms… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
“At some point, I figured that it would be more effective and far funnier to embrace the ugliest, most terrifying things in… — Sarah Silverman Copy Share Image
Gary Greenberg is a thoughtful comedian and a cranky philosopher and a humble pest of a reporter, equal parts Woody Allen, Kierkegaard,… — Gideon Lewis-Kraus Copy Share Image
I think comedy is difficult, and I'm amazed so many people want to do it. I'll be buying jeans and somebody will… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
I always wanted to be a comedian. I loved comedy since I was a little kid, and while I was at university… — Jim Jefferies Copy Share Image
When you're a young comedian the first thing you want to do is get a laugh. — Baron Vaughn Copy Share Image
I'm not a comedian. I didn't study sketch comedy; my background isn't that. — Paul Rudd Copy Share Image
