Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Used books are the sluts of the literary world. Passed around from person to person, spreading their pages for anyone, getting cheaper… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news at you. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
The summer movies are coming out. My advice: just stay home and burn a good book. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
You should spend more time with your families; write that novel you've always wanted to write. You know, the one about the… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
“As far as I can tell, a young adult novel is a regular novel that people actually read.” — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I am no fan of books. And chances are, if you're reading this, you and I share a healthy skepticism about the… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
You don't look up truthiness in a book, you look it up in your gut. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Northwestern's alumni list is truly impressive. This university has graduated best-selling authors, Olympians, presidential candidates, Grammy winners, Peabody winners, Emmy winners, and… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
“Just because I haven't put a lot of thought into this book doesn't mean you shouldn't. I warn you to read this… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
You said in your book that at the end of the day, every politician is human. What about during the day? — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
When I read books it's to escape. It's so I don't have to talk to people. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
And that brings us to tonight's word: Truthiness. Now I'm sure some of the word-police, the 'wordanistas' over at Websters, are gonna… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I don't trust books. They're all fact, no heart. And that's exactly what's pulling our country apart today. Because face it, folks,… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Think books aren't scary? Well, think about this: You can't spell "Book" without "Boo! — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Pain is the body's way of telling the brain it's in trouble. Similarly, confusion is the brain's way of telling the body,… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I've always been a big fan of beauty. Sure, you can't judge a book by its cover but who wants to have… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Don't be bitter. Everybody suffers. If you can accept your suffering then you will understand other people better. Be grateful for pain. Love life. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
We all deserve credit for this new surveillance state that we live in because we the people voted for the Patriot Act. Democrats and… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I've long been against illegal aliens, partly because they distract us from an even bigger threat: real aliens. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Believe in me, cause I don't believe in anything, and I wanna be someone to believe. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
It's August, which means Congress is on recess and Mitch McConnell has shimmied back into the ocean to seek a mate. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Try to love others and serve others and hopefully find those who love and serve you in return. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Thirty seconds is the exact amount of time Americans can tolerate something they don't understand. — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that.… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
I live by syllogisms: God is love. Love is blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God. I don't know what I'd… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
“Unlike Paul Newman, who seems to think that salad dressing is the cure-all for America's ills, I'm a man of action.” — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for… — Stephen Colbert Copy Share Image
